what if god was one of us....

ok, so...i encountered God this morning.....after i got out of my car in front of the comp care building and before i walked into the Rotary meeting.....i had stopped long enough to take off my coat and toss it into the passenger seat....and then tested the reality of my locked car doors by clicking again to hear the honk.....and i turned to walk into the church...and there was a woman walking by.....i am not sure whether she was coming from the home at the end of the parking lot, or from the church playground, or from comp care....i smiled at her......this much i can be sure....and she turned to me and said...'my, but you look nice today'......and then she walked on.....that my part i am doubly sure...because i listened extra carefully because she said "my".......my own family never bothers to comment on my appearance in public, and yet this stranger managed to stop me dead in my tracks with an un-foreseen complement.....i am reminded of the soulful tune by Joan Osborne...

"What if God was one of us
Just a slob like one of us
Just a stranger on the bus
Trying to make his way home

The woman who spoke to me was just a slob like one of us who took the time to say something kind to one of use....and this act of random kindmess made a differnece in my path toward righteousness.

exasperated....

ok, so....i have so much going on that blogging appears to have dropped down in the list of priorities.....behind parenting issues, budgetary woes, supervisory snafus, and the small yet irritating annoyances that keep me awake at night....like the floral silk scarf that i last wore with the black linen dress ....lost.....and my mother's taxes that remain at the accountant's office......unfinished......that sort of thing.....and the hydrangeas that are either slow to bud out or are in fact....dead....and last ,but not least....is our blind but not deaf cat that decided at 4:30 am to demand her breakfast......not ready to put her out of our misery....too much going on....

a wink is as good as a nod to a blind cat

ok, so.....long-time with no blogs.....there is plenty to blog about, but most of what is going on in my humble existence is embargoed information, either with regards to work, or family, or some form of denial on my part......that said, i have concluded that the cat's pitiable decline is fair game, so to speak.....the cat's eyes started out looking bloodshot, with dilated pupils and an eerie appearance.....the child most likely to be concerned about pet health insisted that she be taken to the vet and all manner of treatment be afforded her.....alas, the cat is at least 14 years old, scraggly and scrawny.....and while emotions may nudge at lifesaving heroics, reality suggests that making her safe and comfortable in her decline is the kindest thing we can do....and so we pick her up and bring her back in the house when she wanders, and nudge her in the general directon of the door when she runs straight into the wall....this has happened more than once, and it is painful to watch......she sometimes misses the plant shelf in the guest room where she takes her meals, or just barely gets her paws hooked on the edge and has to drag herself the rest of the way up.....our poor precious......

reflections on handedness....

ok, so.....the nytimes had an article on handedness this week...one that i have read more than once in hopes of finding clarity.....here is a curious quote....The percentage of left-handers in the population seems to be relatively constant, at 10 percent. And this goes back to studies of cave paintings, looking at which hands hunters are using to hold their spears, and to archaeological analyses of ancient artifacts. So though there has been prejudice against left-handers, and though there may be some developmental risks, said Dr. Geschwind, “there clearly must be advantages as well. The reason why it maintains that way, nobody knows what it is.”

clear advantages to be in the bottom 10% of the population? hmmmm.....i am at a loss for what those advantages might be.....

for the record, i write (poorly) with my left hand, eat with my left hand, and as i sit typing my coffee is at my left hand......if it were the evening, my wine glass would be at my right....i use regular scissors, bat and hold a racket with my right hand......i type with 2 fingers...mostly...sometimes 4 but only if i make an effort and concentrate on the task....i wear my watch on my right wrist....a sure giveaway of handedness......it is a struggle to actually put on a watch, as my left hand is less agile with small tasks....

in my current work day i must 'sign out' at lunch on a board that can only be reached comfortably by a right-hander.....and so i have made it a point of pride to write 'walking' or 'rotary' or 'lunch' in vaguely recognizable block letters with my right hand......and i am in awe that i hold the marker as awkwardly with that hand as i hold any writing implement in my left hand.....could it be that i have no handedness at all? or is my state of ambidextrousness the product of a scrambled brain?

i mentioned at the start that i often reread passages for clarity.....reread entire books numerous times in hopes of gleaning a few extra insights.....could i simply have a learning disability relating to reading that has been overcome by sheer will and persistence? I have rarely read the printed word in novel form since i discovered how to click an order and download a novel to my iphone.....i find a level of satisfaction with the spoken word that i can never recall achieving with rereading the written word.....does this have anything to do with a brain muddled by handedness?

having had my say on personal handedness issues, where do i go from here?.....nowhere different than before my 'rant'.....i suppose...though it will be interesting to see how senility will express itself in terms of handedness....will i simply forget how to hold a pen with my left hand and start using the right hand? will i forget how to use my left hand for fork-ready foods and stop eating altogether?.....or could the advantange of left-handedness be the ability to roll with the punches of senility in a way unknwon to the righties?....hopefully these revelations are years away....and i wil have plenty of time to muddle through with my muddled brain in the meantime....

fast-forward....

ok, so.....circumstances of late are mostly gloomy....with the potential for major cuts in funding for public health (maternal and child nutrition, contraception, breast and cervical cancer. etc...) funding cuts will almost certainly lead to staffing cuts, and mayhem and morale issues will certainly follow.....i would give my eye teeth to simply fast-forward past it all.....

eat, pray, love

ok, so.....i went ahead and watched the movie despite being not-so enamored of the book.....maybe it is because i could not get my mind around a journey to self-discovery that did not include living for a time in paris....

the week that was.....

ok, so......my week started off with the phone call from my mother asking me for a ride to the ER...seems she tripped over the cord to her electric bed pad and split her lip....the ER visit was complicated by the series of questions put ot my mother by each practitioner about the exact anture of her injury....was it an accident or granny abuse- not in so many words but that was the gist.....the fall came on the very day that her housecleaner picked up all the newspapers, inserts, envelopes and other mail components that my mother tosses aside after reading.....it is a miracle that she has not fallen long before this.....i volunteered at the free clinic on Tuesday after work, then went on to the college pool to watch our daughter's last swim meet.....Wednesday evening I helped serve at a church supper...Thursday after work was my EKU class......and finally on Friday I went straight home from work....amen, amen, and amen.....I am following the OSU-Minnesota game on CNN- given that CBS chose to air Wisconsin-Michigan State instead this afternoon.....will probably watch the football game- for the commercials if nothing else....

A Palin-free February

ok, so.....one of my dear on-line Scrabble partners posted to her Facebook page a piece from the Washington Post in which Dana Milbanks takes the Palin-Free February Pledge....he theorizes that she gets coverage because so many of us are obsessed with reading about her latest foolishness, our 'clicks' on links/stories etc just encourages those who write these stories to cover her antics more often.....he further asserts that if we simply stop reading/watching about her, those who write and broadcast will move on to more substantive fodder.....worth a try on my end.....the woman makes me crazy, and is likely to blame (at least partially) for my recent bouts of high blood pressure....so starting Tuesday I pledge to not click on stories I know to be about her......i do not know if I will be able to avert my eyes from headlines that include her name....I would have to give up all news outlets for the month as well.....but I ceetainly can restrain my urge to click on those stories for 28 full daysa....

tragic shooting in AZ

ok, so....a third term democratic congresswoman was shot and 12 others killed or wounded as a gunman opened fire at a town meeting in Tuscon yesterday....the shooter was captured and his myspace site scoured for clues.....from all i can read about him he appears to be anti-government.....my brother has FB'ed that the shooter was clearly a left-wing radical......clearly?......i would describe that sentiment as right-wing....the congresswoman was still shown as under the cross hairs of SarahPac....and the congresswoman herself has given public comment on the 'cross hairs' issue......so, should we as reasonable Americans hold SP responsible for inciting the unstable to actually put the targeted congresswoman in his cross hairs?

comfort and joy

ok, so.....i figured out sometime midmorning that if my brother was on FB then he was not in the car driving to ky and would certainly not be here in time for the annual dinner at Shakertown......and so i sent a simple text....'coming?'....and went about my errands....the reply came just before i picked up my mother for her hair appointment.....not sure if and when he can come given that his roommate just had back sugery and his son has bronchitis.....gentle readers....the post that existed int his space temproarily was removed....as one should never leave a trail when one fusses about one's blood kin about the second year in a row that circumstances beyond their control has prevented them from visiting either their closest blood kin.....so where is the comfort or the joy in this post?.......it was in the short time i spent in my mother's beauty parlor...chatting with an octogenarian from my church, the estranged grandmother of my ex-partner and an elegantly dressed woman who looked 70 but was likely in her 80's (cream cashmere sweater over a taupe sweater/skirt set with lovely Italian cuffed boots with a heel that was not too tall nor too stumpy) named dolly who looked like she could be russian royalty...she told me that i had 'good hair'.....coming from a woman who has inspired me to grey gloriously, this was a compliment indeed.....at this time of year, and at my age one finds comfort and joy anywhere one can....

look in fridge

ok, so.....i slept in til nearly 7:00 am this morning....and as i was shuffling through the kitchen toward the coffeemaker i saw a note on the counter that read.....'look in fridge'.....so i looked in the fridge.....and saw nothing that was not there last night, nothing out of place, and certainly nothing that looked special enough to warrant a note.......will wait for the person with that distinctive handwriting to return with an explanation....

smoked salmon dreams

ok, so.....the few times i get around to blogging seem to be for the sole purpose of recording my dreams.....i was moved to blog on this particular day because i am still thinking about dream from earlier in the week....the one about the hunk of unsliced smoked salmon wrapped up inside a bread-bag and secured with a twist-tie.....the unsliced part was the problematic theme to the dream.....i wanted to have a few bites of the salmon, but the chunk has never been thinly pre-sliced....as every package of smoked salmon that i have ever opened has been so sliced, i had a problem to solve.....that si the part that i cannot remember these days later....just the salmon in the bread bag.....i could go for some smoked salmon right this very minute....preferably with a poached egg over a toasted enlgish muffin topped with hollandaise......oh my.....that is the stuff dreams are made of.....

hannah coulter

ok, so i came to the part in this novel by wendell berry where caleb comes home from college and his father nathan starts to make plans for him to take over his share of the farm, and caleb has to tell his father that he is home for a visit but that he will not be staying....he has plans beyond the farm......this conversation is part of the vocal heritage of my father's side of the family......of my own grandfather sitting down with my father on a visit home after graduation but before my parents wedding to discuss the future......and my father having to tell my grandfather than had he purchased the adjoining farm when it came up for sale as my father had suggested, there would have been enough acreage to support two families but as things stood, there simply was not an adequate living for two families on the existing farm....and my father had made other working arrangements......i write this with great regret, now that a child of mine has voiced an interest in the livelihood that used to be a given for both sides of my family....my mother's father gave up all hope of passing on his farm when he fathered two daughters.....he sold off the farm for a housing development......i treasure the copper stencil that my great-grandfather used to paint 'stephan' on each of his crates of produce....the stephan family grew fruits and vegetables on a farm above the canal just south of cleveland, ohio since the civil war days......the family place i visited in germany actually includes several fields now worked by a tenant....which means that as far back as the 1500's our ancestors have worked close to the land..... and so i admit freely that there were tears in my eyes as i listened to this part of the novel....because i knew that this conversation is not singular to the coulters, nor to the crowns, but to far too many dwindling farm families.....

latkes

ok, so......i view the making of latkes as a sign of a leisurely Saturday or long-weekend off....the variations depend on the available potatoes: white, red, yellow, sweet.....or a combination of those tubers....this morning we enjoyed sweet potato latkes with a sprinkling of parsley and sour cream........i get out the copper pan often enough that the latkes have become simply a sign that mamma feels like making them.....and i am therefore caught off-guard for a moment or two when i see articles in culinary magazines or the nytimes about the association of these wonderful fried potato confections with religious observances.....like Hanukkah.....i am not remotely Jewish according to my next-of-kin......but I suspect that I have Jewish roots that go deeper than the living memory of loved ones.....the connection between me and fried shredded potatoes is essential.....and too intense to be coincidental...

1/2 bottle of riesling

ok, so.....yesterday at my in-law's home we gathered for a Thanksgiving feast......i arrived with our car-full around 1:00-ish to find the questionably-done turkey already on the counter covered in tinfoil.....and to witness another extended family member empty half a bottle of riesling into a large tumbler, drop in a few ice cubes, and move on......gentle readers......if i had married into such a household i would have drank the other half of her bottle, despite my loathing for sweet wines.....i did go out of my way to avoid the turkey, having suffered a severe case of food poisoning in that very place over a decade ago.....and i when i happened to see second half of the bottle go the way of the first, i smiled and went on about my business.......

In Mass....on our way to supper....have not been in New England since Stephan looked at colleges

In Chicago halfway to Albany and our weekend with Stephan

wine and cheese

ok, so i started my round of errands with a visit to v the market.....i went in looking to buy goat cheese and ended up not only with Mont St. Francis from Indiana, but also Heinrich Red to go with it....and then several others bottles for upcoming occasions...and a jug of a pilsner from the tap....i like the notion of buying a jug and refilling it from a tap.....i will admit that i spent more per bottle than i spend per week on a boxed white.....i was determined to select my bottles based on their attributes rather than price....isn't that why i work that second job?......not only to fund my addiction to travel but also to add to the local economy by supporting home-grown entrepreneurs.....the red wine is delightful.....which i suppose proves that you get what you pay for when it comes to wine.....

ok, so.....the day has come when Peggy Noonan and I have something in common....this piece is excerpted from Ms. Noonan's column in which she rips into the half-term governor for comparing her career to that of Ronald Reagan.

"Excuse me, but this was ignorant even for Mrs. Palin. Reagan people quietly flipped their lids, but I'll voice their consternation to make a larger point. Ronald Reagan was an artist who willed himself into leadership as president of a major American labor union (Screen Actors Guild, seven terms, 1947-59.) He led that union successfully through major upheavals (the Hollywood communist wars, labor-management struggles); discovered and honed his ability to speak persuasively by talking to workers on the line at General Electric for eight years; was elected to and completed two full terms as governor of California; challenged and almost unseated an incumbent president of his own party; and went on to popularize modern conservative political philosophy without the help of a conservative infrastructure. Then he was elected president."

"The point is not 'He was a great man and you are a nincompoop,' though that is true," Noonan continues. "The point is that Reagan's career is a guide, not only for the tea party but for all in politics. He brought his fully mature, fully seasoned self into politics with him. He wasn't in search of a life when he ran for office, and he wasn't in search of fame; he'd already lived a life, he was already well known, he'd accomplished things in the world."

WWGCD?

ok, so i enjoyed the daylights out of watching the rally for sanity livestreamed on comedy central....while i was supposed to be outside helping my spouse build the faux rock wall that will add yet another terrace to our slope and give us a far deeper vegetable planting area.....i was moved to tears watching yusaf (AKA cat stevens) sing peace train.....that song really takes me back....and i so enjoyed the signs....especially the one pictured here.....WWGCD?.....ky's own george clooney would be a voice for sanity in the politcal debate....and i so grateful for patirots like jon stewart, whose poignant closing words summed up the rally quite nicely...really wish i had been there.....