it is not well with my soul...

ok,so.....the wedding was more difficult than anticipated...i found that i could not take communion with a clear and steady heart.....and was relieved when the hymn peace like a river was not sung....the refrain 'it is well with my soul'.....was not a song i could sing on this sad occassion....at the reception....at the family farm...all but one photo of my late sisterinlaw had disappeared......and the house had been usurped by the newcomer's kin......a reality that i was unprepared to handle...i have no desire to return to that house.......and i said my goodbyes in my own fashion..