dishwasher area as a post-bermuda triangle

ok, so in the past 24 hours, our daytime dishwasher...the brad pitt wannabee....left to go to dui training class.....and has never been seen again......whilst the neely hired evening dishwasher had a panic attack last night and had to be rushed to the emergency room......he was cold as ice, pale as a ghost.........or so i have heard........unfortunately, none of the college or high school age folks who have come by asking for summer employment have expressed interest in dishwashing.......they all want to wait tables and collect large tips........no matter what the us govt says about illegal aliens, i would give my eyeteeth to have 2 or 3 illegal aliens on staff, right at this minute............they would have reason to work hard, and they would show up for work, and they may just last longer than those we have hired recently.............