critical conversation.....

ok, so we had a brief but critical conversation this morning before my spouse left the house....well, not that critical but one that warrants further exploration later on.....to set the stage, a good friend of ours was set to go to iowa to ride the annual ragbrai event..with his lovely bride....a stage bike ride across the state that attracts all sorts of folks....our friends the morgans went as a family....they have gone before with others from danville....collectively their team is called the stray dogs...they print up shirts.....but i digress....the ride is nor a race as much as it is a moveable feast....towns along the way use the selling of breakfast, lunch, snacks, dinner, and all manner of libations as organizational fundraisers......and particpants camp in places like fairgrounds, school football fields, community parks, etc.......all well and good, except that our friend had 3 stints put in on thursday.....and was seriously considering driving to iowa against medical advice on saturday.......and there is where the conversation started....about whether tis nobler to live life on the edge, or to play it safe........carpe diem with bandages still covering the wounds from the heart cath......hmmmm........yes, our friend had been planning this adventure for 2 years...he and his wife had trained for it, were psyched for it......and is now deeply disappointed.......i understand this......but i also have an opinion on the subject based on personal experience.......my middle child attempted this ride, with the stray dogs 5 years ago......started out the first day with a bit of a sore throat, and failed to drink enough fluid because it hurt to swallow.....and ended up in the emergency room in the small town of greenville, iowa......a singlestory concrete block building with one nurse's station.......because this ride moves on daily........our friends were forced to leave out boy alone in the hospital until we were able to arrive.......the call came about 11:00 pm....we got right in the car and drove all night...passed by the st.louis arch at dawn....and located the hospital midafternoon.......iowa is not a place to go knowing that your health is fragile.......no matter how fit or determined a person may be.....this ride doesn't tend to go past major medical centers......it favors the small towns with lovely views of cornfields........an idyllic place to ride a bike, with 6,000 other folks, but not a place to prove that one is invincible......the ride happens every year........this is not the last chance for such an experience........and the part of the conversation with my spouse that sticks in my mind is the part of about how he admires folks to live on the edge.......and though he did say that he would not have gone to iowa having just been discharged from the hospital with stints........there is till doubt my mind that he wouldn't have seriously considered going ......fortunately, this is a bridge that we may never have to cross ourselves.....the weighing of one partner's need for fulfillment/adventure against a spouse's desire for extended companionship....i would be very disappointed if my spouse were to die out on an adventure taken against medical advice......much moreso that if her was out on one of his regular runs/rides.......that would be a fitting way to go, in fact....but not knowing from the onset that it was that risky.........