Monday, October 31, 2005


ok, so this was from slate.com re: family man judge alito......We have no reason to doubt that Judge Alito is, as people close to him say, a mild-mannered, generous man who dotes on his family. It's just other people's wives and daughters he seems to have a problem with: "You'll hear a lot about some of Alito's other decisions in the coming days, including his vote to limit Congress' power to ban even machine-gun possession, and his ruling that broadened police search powers to include the right to strip-search a drug dealer's wife and 10-year-old daughter -- although they were not mentioned in the search warrant."

Lithwick also points out that Alito isn't big on helping victims of sex discrimination and doesn't much like the Family and Medical Leave Act. But they still call him a family man. .......i consider this guy much more frightening than a candidate with no experience.......he reeks of the new american taliban..... Posted by Picasa

trick or treat.....

ok, so for the umpteenth year we passed out candy in front of the bikeshop during the annual downtown halloween event.....loads and loads of candy.....enjoyed the opportunity to see some of my favorite young and not-so-young parents of little ones.....like our friends who have recently adopted their 5th child....or rather...adopted their third child which makes for a total of 5...got that?.......curiously...their chinese children look more like them than their own offspring.....and then there were the folks who had no business trick or treating........like the girl in the witch costume who couldn't tear herself away from her call to speak yet managed to hold out her pumpkin.......gentle readers....if you are cell-phone savvy....you are too old for halloween....and then there were the parents who could barely contain their youngsters because with one hand on a stroller and the other clutching a lit cigarette there were no more hands to corral the offspring......gentle readers....those whose addiction to nicotine interferes with child safety need not be out on halloween in charge of children... ....and then there were cayle's classmates out tirck-or-treating.....to her credit she did comment that they looked too old to be downtown with the little kids.......especially when it appeared that there were couples trick-or-treating in date-mode.....omg.....if you are old enough to date, you are too old to trick-or-treat.......we did treat ourselves to a pizza on the way home......now that is a real treat for this working mom........

Sunday, October 30, 2005

workday.......

ok, so the day was spent ticking off the taskmaster's list.......my portion of the jobs involved putting away pots and such....and moving viable plants indoors......thankfully the tropical plant survived last night's frost...it was in a very sheltered place.......most of the annuals did not make it past the august heatwave....so this year there were very few plants to fit onto windowsills or the plant window in the guest room........i also spent considerable energy putting away summer clothing and getting out heavier garb......this is a tedious endeavor....between the drawers, the closet shelves, bins, and hangers......i did take the opportunity to toss many an item into the goodwill pile.....i figure if i cannot remember the last time it was worn....well.....it may be time for somebody else to have a go at wearing them........and so it is sunday evening......and while i know that i have enjoyed significant leisuretime this morning........there is still an emptiness that comes from the loss of sunday afternoon to chores rather than relaxation.......with the workweek looming ahead......the nap that didn't happen is always worth a moment or two of regret.......and then there is the book that came in the mail yeserday....zadie smith's white teeth.....as yet unopened.....and that is the trade-off.......well-worn books versus a mostly clean house.......

crows......


ok, so the author of this book was interviewed on npr as i was driving home from taking cayle to youth group at church...the amazon description follows...Based on more than a decade of research, Crows offers an accurate, humorous, and wide-ranging introduction to these fascinating birds. Who would have guessed that there are more than 40 species of ravens and crows, all variations on a theme, cawing and croaking their way through the woodlands of North America, Europe, Asia, Africa, Australia, and various South Sea islands? (Of the temperate continents, only South America doesn?t know the charms of these amusing, intelligent birds.) Topics explored include evolution, distribution, diet and food-getting practices (including their ingenious use of tools), social behavior (including the many crow "languages"), and impact on the human imagination, as reflected in mythology, literature, and popular aphorisms. Appealing to both the avid birder or the more casual nature lover, Crows is rich in insight, humor, and stories.........i enjoyed the revelation that crows use tools.......of course.....the discussion turned to the eerie relationship that crows have to the darker side.......like their presence is ominous of evil to come......this being halloween weekend and all.......but i prefer the image of the crow as clever and crafty, rather than a cruel, nasty bird.......... Posted by Picasa

spring forward, fall back.....

ok, so mm is enamored of the time change........that extra hour that extends sunday morning .....omg.......delicious to wake up gently, without the alarm.....and to amble down to make coffee and a scramble an egg with the full knowledge that there is still plenty of time to read the papers and check the web.......and still make it to church......i did no housework yesterday......so the afternoon will revolve around tidying inside and out.....but for the next few minutes......i am still in leisure mode....

Saturday, October 29, 2005

a loss.....

ok, so i have come to understand the intrinsic trauma suffered my a workmate whose daughter divorced this summer.......the loss of the partner of your child, whether to divorce or breakup....is upsetting.......we had embraced this person as if she would always be one of the family......and to discover that this was no longer in the cards.....we/i feel a profound sense of loss.....i have already bought her christmas gift......and while i understand the circumstances......i feel robbed in that i didn;'t get a chance to say goodbye...yeah...i wasn';t the boyfriend.....but i/we were the folks who thought we would know her forever.......there probably are not hallmark cards for such occassions......

test drive.....

ok, so today....after cayle's run and chinese lunch......we dropped by a toyota dealer so my spouse could look at cars.......who knew.......i am never prepared for the collective need for a new car....in fact i had to ask exactly which vehicle was on the chopping block......turns out that gas mileage and the environment are on the table.......and the switch will go as follows......if the right vehicle can be found.......we will sell andrew's taurus....and he will take the sienna van.....so that we will always have a van to transport stuff too and from wherever......and the new vehicle will be ernst's driving into town when riding the bike doesn't work out......got it?......and so he looked at echo's.......and several of toyota's new scion brand.......nothing firm on when and if.......i have learned this much about any vehicle.....don't get too attached..... because i have married a person who will sell a bike or a car right out from under......personally...i have not gotten over selling the tercel.....the first new car i ever owned.....the purchase was orchestrated by my spouse....as was the sale......and from then on i expect fully to arrive home to some mystery vehicle.......middle child....be warned.....i may arrive in december to pick you up in a car yet to be seen by anybody here..........

ok, so this is a photo of torro, fleshy tuna sushi that was the lunch of asumi, a girl from japan who read my blog at length today.......i like to backtrack and read the blogs of bloggers who read my blog.....just out of curiousity.....and out of a need to have something interesting to read.......this sushi was from a conveyor style sushi place.......looks tasty Posted by Picasa

so many bloggable themes, so little time.....

ok, so the bare slate backons.....and i could commit to cyberspace my thoughts on the plamegate indictment......or the cold weather.....or the last cross country meet of the season...or the woman in oregon who won the lottery with a ticket paid for by a stolen credit card....(ooops).....but i shall focus on my dreams last night......my frustrating dreams......which took place in a house similar to the one my aunt and unlce in cleveland used to own...only this was on a hill....and they had their r.v. parked under a tree....with a refrigerator positioned outside the r.v. door......filled with bottled not canned soft drinks...that were all warm because the refrigerator was not workable......and when i went in search of my uncle to tell him that the pop was warm because the fridge wasn't working, i couldn't find shoes that fit.....for this must have a been a task that required footgear......and there was a pile of shoes...mostly sandals....in the bedroom i was using......and each pair was so big as to be clownish.....or with heels too tall......and i kept asking aloud where my sandals were (meaning certainly my black merrills...)and where did these other sandals come from..and why was i wanting to wear sandals anyway, as the waether has turned so cold....and all the while i was thirsty because the soft drinks were too warm to consume.....and at some point there were church people present......and my aunt was explaining that i wouldn't be going to services because i couldn't find shoes .....except the aunt who said this was my dad's oldest sister who lives in fremont, not cleveland.....and heaven knows how she got involved in this dream.......heaven knows how any of these disjointed elements get tied together in a dream.......warm pepsi in glass bottles....hmmm......i have really tried to avoid soft drinks all together of late.....no good for the teeth or the waistline.....and the caffeine does me no favors.....and bottles?......where does one buy those these days......what this dream really needed was some authentic drama.....like somebody in the minute mart purchasing the lottery ticket with a stolen credit card while i am buying a really cold beverage.......now that would have been interesting, only that we wouldn't have known it was winning, nor that the credit card was stolen....but in dreams anything is possible........lots of ways that one could have gone......and maybe an indictment or two could have fancied things up a bit.....maybe my aunt from fremont has a great-nephew on the other side of the family who works at the justice department.....and he knows who leaked the fact that wilson's wife was c.i.a......and he was hiding out in the r.v. in cleveland.......that doesn't make sense, but dreams never make sense....i just like the witness-hiding-out-in-the-r.v.-with-warm-pop.......plot line.........ah well.....must get moving....have to get cayle to the cross country bus on time........

Friday, October 28, 2005

a portrait of rachel.....

ok, so i popped into the tapley exhibit at the arts center in hopes that the portrait was completed and on display.......rats......the artist himself commented that nobody had hoped it would be done in time more than he......i enjoyed seeing again the still life that belongs to wilma b....i saw it last in nyc at sheldon's big opening....the evening that i lost stephan in the subway......by the way, stephan....wilma sends her regards.......the oils and pastels on display are quite lovely....though my favorite piece is the pastel of a hot springs in yellowstone that hangs in the artist's dining room....it is exquisite....and i can see myself decorating an entire home around it....should my ship ever come in.....that is my personal definition of good art.....pieces that i would/could/should not only obtain....but plan around for maximum enjoyment.......

Thursday, October 27, 2005

harriet

ok, so part of me feels sorry for harriet miers......after she was so obviously forced out by the republican majority......not that i felt that she was qualified, she wasn't..but because i felt that was un-qualified because of dubya.....this was somebody who should have been put forth for judgeships ages ago.......but wasn't because dubya liked having her close at hand......and though i agree with alexander hamilton that the president has no business putting forth his friends for the best appointments, let alone the supreme court.......i still have this image of harriet......as arriet in ozzie and harriet....the last hold-out of the 50's dream family wiffie at home.........in high heels and pearls.......and i am somewhat saddened.....somewhat saddened...not taketomybed saddened......and i do not not know her in my heart......that is all i have to say................

monarch of the glen.....

ok, so just this moment my own mother could not take time to talk to me about arrangements for us all to drive to lexington saturday to see cayle run her last c.c. raceof the season because she was watching monarch of the glen on bbc america.....got that?......well, i don't.....and that was her point....that i really needed to get cable because i miss all the good shows.......i could have retorted with numerous comebacks about missing all the good books......but i demured...because that is what one does with one's mother........she has asked my brother to send her to the chelsea flower show for her christmas present excursion..(yeah...it's in may...so it will be belated xmas.....)...he has sent her to elderhostels in arizona the last several years....to study tony hillerman novels, the navajo in general....and to study hummingbirds this last time around....we have kin in arizona, and family friends in new mexico....but their kind are dwindling with age and death....and now she has decided that she wants to go to england....with her after-church lunch partner........this is good news......that she is still up for travel......in fact...she also tells me that she is going to cleveland for thanksgiving with my brother to visit with her sister and my cousin.............who knew?....they didn't invite me........and so i am planning a much smaller celebration with my spouses's little sister and her family........in fact....she may be going to paris with me to celebrate my 50th this winter.........she has always wanted to go.....and i think we would have a great time......as she loves good food and good wine and good shopping.......as i have no sisters, i should simply adopt her as my own......ah well.....must start thinking about the best long weekend.....in february or march.....which hotel...where to eat........there is nothing better to lift one's spirits than a carrot in front of one's cart.............

sweep.....

ok, s the white sox won their first world series in 80+ years against the hapless astros last night 1-0........i lasted through 4 innings before we retired our viewing team......baseball gets old when you don't have a true favorite in the matchup.....but i am pleased that the whitesox, who dominated their division this season from start to finish...completed the trajectory for a long-awaited series win......now, let me see who should win next year..........and for the record, bar bush was there with dubya senior.....same spot behind the batter......alas, she was not to be the astros good luck charm......

Wednesday, October 26, 2005

bar......

ok, so the more entertaining moments of the world series game 3 between houston and chicago white sox last night took place just behind the batter....in the front row of premium seats......barbara bush.....seated next to a big good looking guy obviously not dubya sr.......more likely her sservice handler.......who did a mighty good job of chatting with her rather than watching the game.....'gee, mrs bush, i am so thrilled to be here with you that i'd do it for free if i was asked....'....or some such foolish dribble......i found it all amusing....the camera never quite caught him full in the face....he was always turned sideways as if to hang on her every word.....that or his witness protection agreement required only vague side shots if ever on camera.........no idea where dubya senior was......maybe in some private skybox with her mistress enjoying the game?.........or maybe fuming because the astros asked nolan ryan to throw out the first pitch and offered the honor to neither of the bush presidents.......wonder if bar could get tickets for game 4?..........

Tuesday, October 25, 2005

deathbed request.....

ok, so i am feeling poorly....but i have strength enough for this.......google the word failure.....and then click on the top response......hee...heee....heee

blogless.....

ok, so have ya noticed that i tend to blog less when i feel like crap......and more when i am feeling top o'the world.........i will not go into great detail about my symptoms....just know this.....when mamma doesn't feel good, mamma ain't happy.....and when mamma ain't happy, ain't nobody happy...........

Monday, October 24, 2005

quitting......

ok, so my daughter is on the phone with her birthmother(b.m.) for their weekly talk......and it is clear that said birthmother has quit yet another job.........sounds like another one of those you can't fire me because i quit moments........well....i talk like i know....but i don't.......i am very slow to give up on lost causes.........the only job i ever really walked away from was my first...at the bowling alley in mt gilead when i was 17...my friend christy was quitting....and when the boss asked if i was quitting as well.....i figured....yeah. why not?......i didn't like flipping burgers..........i worked at my last 2 jobs 18 years and 4 years respectively......and plan to work in my current position until....the cows come home or i can afford to slink away fully funded.........whichever comes first.........but does this make any sense...in the long run....does staying in one place for security purposes inspite of misery make any sense.....i don't know exactly why this latest job has been vacated by the b.m........doesn't tend to take much, as i recall......but then again.......isn't there something to be said for cutting one's losses early on and moving on to better pastures without hesitation or delay........i cannot say for myself......such choioces are completely against my nature........but i cannot fault those who make impetuous moves, especially if they succeed at some point to say.....' i told you i could do better than that........'

ok, so the nyt reports that the dubya white house has taken time out from its full plate to sick its lawyers on the onion....for displaying the presidential seal in such a way as to give the impression that the president or his office endorses the business or product........uh...excuse me for pointing this out......the onion is pure satire.......delicious satire.....and there is no product.....so could dubya be so hard up for distracting targets in the plamegate/meirsgate/delaygate/fristgate world that he has succumbed to the onion as his latest target?...........omg......the bright spot in this debacle is the publicity......like any attempt to censor.....telling people about things that they shouldn't read, for any reason, tends to increase interest............ Posted by Picasa

Sunday, October 23, 2005

tea and sympathy......

ok, so i gave up on my nap when i could not get comfortable......lying (laying?) down is overrated when one's sinus passages are blocked and one's face is swollen and one's throat is sore......i had been advised by those who claim to know that exercise was all that i needed to get over this malady.....so i walked 62 minutes on the treadmill....and felt fatigued enough for a good long slumber......but it seems that i breathe better sitting or standing up.........i hope that i am rested enough for tonight's baseball game.......i went to bed early on in last night's game.......i think i saw 5 or 6 innings....but the baseball is quickly runningout.....and i want to see all that i can while it is still televised.....in these parts few sporting games can be seen for free, with the exception of uk basketball and......nascar.....and golf.....curiously, golf is sometimes televised on all three major channels.......go figure......so it either brings in enough of an audience to pay the bills for these stations, or it is cheaper than any available filler......and since i do not consider golf worth my time.......i usually read on those occassions....speaking of reading.....i finished on beauty......with mixed thoughts.....it was the sort of book where i was more impressed by the prose than the plot.......it may be that the plot was too potentially painful.....a spouse's midlife crisis that involved betrayal with more than one unsuitable.......as if there can be suitable partners for one's adulterous affairs.......either way...it was painful to read about these events...imagining what i would feel like being the wife sitting home knowing it was going on.....or not sitting home......don't want to divulge too much of the plot.....though i will also say that the comparisons made to howard's end by critis were, in my humble opinion, curious with the exception of one specific plot line......and even that was only a minor similarity rather than a bold and blatant one....even if the author says so herself.......if she intended for it to be another howard's end than i don't consider it a successful attempt.......but back to the prose......there was numerous passages of description that were lilting and palpable and so evocative that i envied her gift ......maybe when she moves on from midlife crises to something like relationship dysfunction i will be willing to own that she has melded prose and plot to perfection..............enough for now.....i must hold my head over steaming liquid and find good drugs for what ails me...........

Friday, October 21, 2005

borrowed...

ok, so i have borrowed this poem......so as not to lose it....


A Letter From Home
by Mary Oliver



She sends me news of blue jays, frost,
Of stars and now the harvest moon
That rides above the stricken hills.
Lightly, she speaks of cold, of pain,
And lists what is already lost.


Here where my life seems hard and slow,
I read of glowing melons piled
Beside the door, and baskets filled
With fennel, rosemary and dill,
While all she could not gather in
Or hid in leaves, grow black and falls.
Here where my life seems hard and strange,
I read her wild excitement when
Stars climb, frost comes, and blue jays sing.
The broken year will make no change
Upon her wise and whirling heart; -
She knows how people always plan
To live their lives, and never do.
She will not tell me if she cries.

I touch the crosses by her name;
I fold the pages as I rise,
And tip the envelope, from which
Drift scraps of borage, woodbine, rue.




one of the few novels that my grandmother crown owned was the girl of the linderlost....she may have even read it aloud to me.......and this poem so reminds me of the essence of that book.......

on-line purchases......

ok, so i ordered on line the following books from the 100 list........the blind assasin.......by margaret atwood........red harvest by daschell hammett....and white teeth by zadie smith....who wrote the book i have borrowed from the library....on beauty........that only puts me up tp 32 books out of 100...but the rest did not inspire purchase.........

thanks all around.....

ok, so i went to my randomly scheduled interesting women's friday evening wine and cheese gathering and came away feeling as if i needed to broadcast a blanket thanks to those young people who have been so essential in the nuturing of my offspring........and though the conversation focused mostly on those of the age of my middle child.......i am thankful for those who came before and will hopefully come after........i suppose the discussion started with montessori....and how i had in common with the invited guest to this soiree the fact that we both had children who had been asked to leave montessori.......and i was reminded of just how much my older children drew strength from their montessori friends.....like the sentator and the loyal opposition......and how then i was reminded of just how much the appearance of platinum chains meant to me as a parent... someone who could understand my child in the high school vacumn....and lift him up long enough to get him into higher ground......to have such a brilliant person around my child as he went through a difficult phase...let me tell you...i would drive cross country if this person were to call and tell me she needed help.....i feel such gratitude....and then there was tosca.......another incredibly talented influence...........i rattle on so because i have been recently reminded of all that is owed to these folks.....when one sits and chats with folks whose children lack such solid friends...omg.......i realize how lucky we were that our children were at montessori at just the right time....and bate at just the right time....and dhs at just the right time......and governor's scholars......yeah......this is a mom's discussion.....keep in mind that i spent 2.5 hours this evening with other perimenopausal women......be thankful that this a tribute blog rather than a rant.....

trc closes......

ok, so my mom called me breathlessly to ask if i had heard the news......like something grave or monumental had happened.....like the hindenburg tragedy.....or the pakistan earthquake.......'the restaurant closed.....' she said quickly........'you know...two roads.....'....and then she waited for my answer...like i would have a reaction......but i couldn't come up with a response other than 'oh.....when did that happen?'.......for me, such an announcement is like telling me that franco is still dead........as i have stepped in the place only once in over a year....and only to give gail a present......and i think about it even less.....no regrets there.......well, one regret, i really wish i had a better relationship with my ex-partner.......i really miss the friendship we had before we got in over our heads.......

Thursday, October 20, 2005

time best 100 english language novels since 1924....

ok, so this is the list

The Adventures of Augie March
Saul Bellow

All the King's Men
Robert Penn Warren

American Pastoral
Philip Roth

An American Tragedy
Theodore Dreiser

Animal Farm
George Orwell


Appointment in Samarra
John O'Hara

Are You There God? It's Me, Margaret
Judy Blume

The Assistant
Bernard Malamud

At Swim-Two-Birds
Flann O'Brien

Atonement
Ian McEwan

Beloved
Toni Morrison

The Berlin Stories
Christopher Isherwood

The Big Sleep
Raymond Chandler


The Blind Assassin
Margaret Atwood

Blood Meridian
Cormac McCarthy

Brideshead Revisited
Evelyn Waugh

The Bridge of San Luis Rey
Thornton Wilder

Call It Sleep
Henry Roth

Catch-22
Joseph Heller


The Catcher in the Rye
J.D. Salinger


A Clockwork Orange
Anthony Burgess

The Confessions of Nat Turner
William Styron

The Corrections
Jonathan Franzen


The Crying of Lot 49
Thomas Pynchon

A Dance to the Music of Time
Anthony Powell

The Day of the Locust
Nathanael West

Death Comes for the Archbishop
Willa Cather

A Death in the Family
James Agee

The Death of the Heart
Elizabeth Bowen

Deliverance
James Dickey

Dog Soldiers
Robert Stone

Falconer
John Cheever

The French Lieutenant's Woman
John Fowles


The Golden Notebook
Doris Lessing

Go Tell it on the Mountain
James Baldwin

Gone With the Wind
Margaret Mitchell

The Grapes of Wrath
John Steinbeck


Gravity's Rainbow
Thomas Pynchon

The Great Gatsby
F. Scott Fitzgerald


A Handful of Dust
Evelyn Waugh

The Heart Is A Lonely Hunter
Carson McCullers

The Heart of the Matter
Graham Greene

Herzog
Saul Bellow

Housekeeping
Marilynne Robinson

A House for Mr. Biswas
V.S. Naipaul

I, Claudius
Robert Graves


Infinite Jest
David Foster Wallace

Invisible Man
Ralph Ellison


Light in August
William Faulkner

The Lion, The Witch and the Wardrobe
C.S. Lewis

Lolita
Vladimir Nabokov


Lord of the Flies
William Golding

The Lord of the Rings
J.R.R. Tolkien

Loving
Henry Green

Lucky Jim
Kingsley Amis

The Man Who Loved Children
Christina Stead

Midnight's Children
Salman Rushdie

Money
Martin Amis

The Moviegoer
Walker Percy

Mrs. Dalloway
Virginia Woolf


Naked Lunch
William Burroughs

Native Son
Richard Wright

Neuromancer
William Gibson

Never Let Me Go
Kazuo Ishiguro

1984
George Orwell


On the Road
Jack Kerouac


One Flew Over the Cuckoo's Nest
Ken Kesey


The Painted Bird
Jerzy Kosinski

Pale Fire
Vladimir Nabokov

A Passage to India
E.M. Forster

Play It As It Lays
Joan Didion

Portnoy's Complaint
Philip Roth


Possession
A.S. Byatt

The Power and the Glory
Graham Greene

The Prime of Miss Jean Brodie
Muriel Spark

Rabbit, Run
John Updike

Ragtime
E.L. Doctorow

The Recognitions
William Gaddis

Red Harvest
Dashiell Hammett

Revolutionary Road
Richard Yates

The Sheltering Sky
Paul Bowles

Slaughterhouse-Five
Kurt Vonnegut


Snow Crash
Neal Stephenson

The Sot-Weed Factor
John Barth

The Sound and the Fury
William Faulkner

The Sportswriter
Richard Ford

The Spy Who Came in From the Cold
John le Carre

The Sun Also Rises
Ernest Hemingway


Their Eyes Were Watching God
Zora Neale Hurston

Things Fall Apart
Chinua Achebe

To Kill a Mockingbird
Harper Lee


To the Lighthouse
Virginia Woolf

Tropic of Cancer
Henry Miller

Ubik
Philip K. Dick

Under the Net
Iris Murdoch

Under the Volcano
Malcolm Lowry

Watchmen
Alan Moore & Dave Gibbons

White Noise
Don DeLillo

White Teeth
Zadie Smith

Wide Sargasso Sea
Jean Rhys


ok, so i have read 29 of these works....i could offer a cash prize to the person who can identify at least 20 of these titles, based on my known preferences, past blogs, bookclub picks...but it seemed better to just highlight them...thanks to the l.o. for that idea.......and then there is the lack of colette in this list.......what a travesty........who picked these books?...............and what about the books on this list that we actually own and that i haven't bothered to read?........or the books that i started but didn't finish because i was unimpressed?.......

ok, so i am amused by this shoe haiku......

Classic gross grain bow
Vibrant blooms catch the eye
Dancing, dreaming ballet.........

i didn't look at the price.....you know the adage about price........... Posted by Picasa

ok, so we listened to terry gross's interview with george ( proud to be from ky) clooney on the way to princeton on tuesday....all about his murrow movie....and his feud with o-reilly.......who has such mccarthy tendencies......i really admire clooney's classy take on all that the news journalist can and should bring to the table....... Posted by Picasa

going grey.......

ok, so my spouse caught me in the act......of plucking a grey hair from my scalp.......you're going to be bald if you keep that up.........yeah......i know...but for now those little grey hairs are so visible...so reachable.....so manageable.......i am not quite ready for the bottle of medium brown........

thursday county....

ok, so i had unexpected moments in my thursday county experience........and i must say that i have rarely come closer to crying along with a client.....let me explain.......i am used to dealing with folks that are underinformed/uninterested/underinvolved.......and to meet with a pregnant client who was not only none of the above......was a pleasure.....but her story was oh so sad.......she has 2 children from a previous marriage......and to make a long story short....her first spouse had a vascectomy...and she had breast implants.....and now she is remarried and expecting the first child with spouse number 2......and she wants to breastfeed this baby just like she breastfed the first two children........but she is afraid to do so because she knows that her implants have a silicon coating........and though she feels that she is able to make milk she is hesitant to use this milk....and she sat in my little thursday space and sobbed.........and i came damn near close to sobbing with her......for having had the implants for spouse number 1....and then for the marriage to go sour.....and for her new baby to be shortchanged.....well......let me tell you what i said about all of that....for starts......if silicon is an issue....than why is nobody worried about the pregnancy.......if silicon leaks...then isn't it harming the baby as we speak?......nobody seems worried about that....so why worry about nursing the baby after birth that you are feeding via umbilical cord now?......and cannot you get your milk tested ( she is already leaking...)........at the very least she needs a second opinion from her current doctor......a male who has never breastfed........to think that i was so tired that i considered calling in sick today.........somedays it is a good thing to go to work.........

ok, so this photo from bono's wednesday lunch with dubya really made my day.......bono looks like he could up and beat the crap out of dubya....which might be worth the life sentence for assaulting a sitting president.....emphasis on the sitting part......... Posted by Picasa

catch and release?


ok, so this has got to be the most inappropriate mug shot....tom delay looks like he is in the middle of a fund-raising junket....rather than on his way (potentially and if there is a god....) to jail........ Posted by Picasa

Wednesday, October 19, 2005

home.....

ok, so we are home.....completely, car-cleaned-out home.......and so i immediately launched into the preparation for a diabetes class series that starts tomorrow......in my thursday county.......i had downloaded the official state-authorized accept no substitute powerpoint presentations onto the laptop that i am allowed to use......and this evening i could not access any of my files because my password is only good for the laptop when logged into the state system...it would appear......and nothing i could type into the blanks could convince the blasted machine to give me access to ay of my harddrive files......omg.......and thus i must go first to my home county office in the morning to find the original disk....and then drive to my thursday county......and wing this presentation having not really studied the powerpoint slides ahead of time.......this would be problematic were i younger and less experienced.......but i have spoken of all the elements of this official script for enough years as to feel comfortable expounding freeform.....so i am more annoyed than worried.......but enough of this.......the funeral was as funerals often are......an opportunity to visit with ones favorite kin/inlaws and notsofavoritekin/inlaws.......and i came away uplifted by most of what i experienced.......most.......but not all.....i am still troubled by the distant inlaw who interrupted the pastor as he was giving the benediction and asked to speak............reasonable people just don't interrupt funerals.........and so it was to my gasping horror that she related her concern that her motherinlaw might possibly be going to hell rather than heaven....and how she had ventured on a methodical scripture study with her in the days/weeks leading up to her death to assure herself that her spouse's mother....and her children's grandmother would be going to heaven......and then she challenged us all....those present to consider whether we would be going to heaven or hell.......and to make a decision at that very moment as to.....yeah, that's right.............she made what baptists call an altarcall......at her motherinlaws funeral............gentle readers........funerals are not the time nor the place to try to proselytize............when it is my time to go......don't even think about it..........i will haunt you from where i happen to be at the time..........heaven or hell........i am still troubled that someone would actually take time out from her busy life to try to query a dying, choir-singing and regular church-attending woman on her prospects for heaven or hell........it is that sort of behavior that gives christians a bad name, i think.......the notion that somehow this woman had an in to god's ear and could tell my beloved sisterinlaw whether or not she would go to heaven or hell.........as for me.....i consider faith a private affair.....something that is always just between me and my maker.....and certainly not something to be broadcast.....or used as a tool to control the thoughts and concerns of others..............as for the rest of the service..........the music, the readings, and the kind words were a fitting testimony to a woman who had led a kind and giving life.............i shall miss her..........

Tuesday, October 18, 2005

on our way back home.....

ok, so i got this wild idea that we might as well come home from upstate ny...by way of princeton, nj........and have dinner with our middle child before making the long drive southwest on wednesday.........i will blog about the funeral at a later date.......can't think of anything but sdeeing my baby just this second.......

Saturday, October 15, 2005

white rabbit revisited......

ok, so i we have made no definitive plans for our journey north to the funeral....so i will catch y'all up to speed on everything else........like the rest of the white rabbit story........everybody i related this tale expressed frank disappointment that i failed to stop the car and watch til some sort of closure was reached.........in fact....there was actual disagreement on whether i witnessed the scene in lawrenceburg....or harrodsburg.......when my spouse related the story on his usual thursday morning run.....our friend mark insisted that he has a friend in harrodsburg who fit that exact description.....white rabbit/oldhome/highheels......and inquired if i was the one who was mistaken on the location.......and later on the same run the story was retold by mark to joni and sarah......and they agreed....that i must have meant to place my tale in harrodsburg............as if there are 2 women who chase white rabbits in heels in central ky.........rather than just the one......omg.......speaking of chasing.....this morning was the annual jackson run....for the non-danville runners who might read this blog...this is a run that has been hosted 21+ years between the homes of two m.d. brothers who live about 3 miles apart on the same back country road........postponed to october from may by mack's death.......it was such a sad affair.......i walked the 3+ miles between elmer's house and mack's place......along with several other women...including the widow of the man whose memorial scholarship my middle child recived at graduation........got that?......she was in town because centre dedicated their rennovated athletic building to her late father-in-law......or some portion of it.......also in attendence was madame goodwin.....who inquired after both of my sons....and was thrilled to learn that the eldest son had enjoyed his yeats trip to ireland and that the middle child was reading the song of roland.....en francais.......she had just returned from a 5 day elderhostel/backpacking rim to rim in the grand canyon......where she hiked with a couple of 80 year-olds who had ridden their bikes cross country...and then back again after retirement.....omg........my spouse actually won the event.....because our physician ran astry of the marked course......and as elmer had read clearly the follwoing disclaimer before the run began.....the course is clearly marked and if you should get lost than you do not deserve to win.........and though ernst tried to do the right thing by giving his loaf of the bread (the traditional prize....) to rick.....elmer wasn't having it.......and he repeated the pre-run warning about being so stupid as to get lost.......and then elmer read a meditation that mack had written for the sunday morning group in 2001 .....it was all he could do to read it....and there was not a dry eye in mack's front yard......a piece about starting lines....and long stretches....and finishing lines.....and about doing your best in that long stretch........

Friday, October 14, 2005

addendum.....

ok, so my sister-in-law passed away this evening.....surrounded by her family and friends......as it should have been...peacefully and without regret..........

Thursday, October 13, 2005

as i lay dying......

ok, so i have been fantisizing about faulkner as of late......ever since i discovered that he won the nobel prize for literature, once upon a time....i have read 2 of his works........as i lay dying.........and the sound and the fury...both for book club.......in different years.......as i lay dying is the more memorable for usable quotes.......my mother is a fish.......likely the best one sentence chapter in all of literature......this evening i am not pondering prizes....i am thinking about my sister-in-law marilynn.....who is lying....dying....in upstate new york....of a culmination of multiple cancers......and though she is lucid for scant minutes in her 24-hour day.......i worry about the quality of what she is able to consume in that short time.......not necessarily her last meal,....but her end-game menu..........i have blogged numerous times about my favorite jane bernard memory that revolves around the ideal last meal........and this scenario doesn't quite fit one's dying days....one's failing, extinguishing hours......what about the nibbles at the end of the road.....and as i would worry mostly about drink.......i have considered this evening.......what i would want to drink as i lay dying.......assuming i could still make such requests.......and this begs the question........what white wine does one die with........it would be white......not red.....and thus i contrive a ramp through the contenders for the eternal wine....the blanc de blanc........i have fond memories of our honeymoon......a marvelous afternoon spent in the moselle tasting whites, with m,y spouse and a harvard undergrad on holiday.......the progression included a vintage sent as a gift for princess diana's wedding....and thus i would want a kabinet from the moselle in that number when my saints go marching......and also a dom peringnon...... from 1981.......the year my spouse and i visited the champagne district.....and the champangery......for those who keep score...this was the winery tour where the u.s. undergrad was carrying the chair she bought in italy....on the tour...sur les caves.......and so on.......let's see.......i recall a marvelous winery tour in napa....with my friend beth....at beringer.....the gewurtraminer.......ong.....so much like the moselle........and the wine tasting in bordeaux.....mostly reds.......no accounting for taste...i purchased vintage bottles for both my sons on that trip....andrew has yet to open his bottle.......on to.......the roots tour......the dinner in brussels with andrew, stephan and the loyal opposition.....the dinner with the mussels...with the bottle of muscat....?muscadet........it was not as sweet as muscadet i have tried since...and we had 2 bottles , just to be sure....but on that cold winter evening...in our state of euphoriaexhaustion .....i thought it a monumental choice.......and then there is boston......cambridge...a dinner with stephan and a friend of mine.....what was that.....a sancerre...fresh and dry....and not too outrageous for my overly outraged bones........a day in cambridge is like 2 days elsewhere when it comes to annoyance and aging.........and so where does that leave me........back in upstate new york.....with a bottle of locally vintaged white.....on a sunday afternoon luncheon in the gazebo....with a greek salad.....and a nice glass of reisling.....and all of us pretending like none of us would die soon.............

post-season play

ok, so postseason play is not up to last year...but certainly contraversial.....as witnessed by last night's angels/whitesox game......this excerpt is from the l.a. times.......i have read it over and over....read other commentaries.....expert ones........and i am still in disbelief that the white sox were allowed to win this game......

Angels Lose Game in Bizarre Ending
By Tim Brown, Times Staff Writer

CHICAGO — The Angels lost to the White Sox on Wednesday night after a bitterly contested ruling by the umpires that kept the ninth inning alive and gave Chicago a chance to score the winning run — which it promptly did.

It was tied 1-1 in the ninth. There were two outs and two strikes on the batter, Chicago's A.J. Pierzynski.

Then came the fatal pitch. It was low.

Angel catcher Josh Paul reached and caught it — or did he trap it against the dirt? Home plate umpire Doug Eddings waved his right hand and then clenched it, two gestures, he said later, that indicated a swinging strike. But he never called the batter out.

Paul, thinking the inning was over, rolled the ball to the mound and the Angels started to leave the field. But Pierzynski, realizing he hadn't been called out, sprinted to first — and was called safe.

Now the Angels erupted in protest. But the umpires refused to call Pierzynski out, and three pitches later, Joe Crede doubled home pinch-runner Pablo Ozuna from second base and the White Sox won, 2-1, to even the best-of-seven American League championship series at one game apiece.

Eddings later said that Paul had trapped Kelvim Escobar's pitch, a split-fingered fastball that became a swinging strike three to Pierzynski.

In that case, the out had to be recorded by tagging Pierzynski or throwing to first base. Paul instead underhanded the ball toward the mound. Pierzynski, sensing Eddings' hesitance, dashed to first after taking a couple of steps toward his own dugout.

"I didn't hear him call me out, so I thought — I thought for sure the ball hit the ground," said Pierzynski, a catcher himself. "I watched the replay 50 times and I still don't know."

Angel Manager Mike Scioscia argued that Paul caught the ball before it hit the ground, that Eddings called Pierzynski out, "and somewhere along the line, because the guy ran to first base, he altered the call. When an umpire calls a guy out and you're the catcher, and I've caught my share of them, he's out. He didn't call 'swing,' he rang him up with his fist and said, 'You're out.' "

Eddings said he called no such thing. He said he believed the ball was live, even after the two motions he made with his right arm.

Scioscia's on-field debate centered on Paul making the catch, and also on Eddings' gestures, which many interpreted as calling the third out. It was that call that caused the Angels to abandon their positions and Paul to relinquish the ball.

"My interpretation is that's my 'strike three' mechanic when it's a swinging strike," Eddings said. "If you watch, that's what I do the whole entire game."

While many Angels viewed the replay and concluded that Paul had wrapped the webbing of his mitt beneath the ball, and Pierzynski, for one, concluded there was no conclusion to be had, Eddings, his crew, and umpire supervisor Rich Rieker agreed that Paul had trapped it.

Using what Rieker called "some technology," the six-man umpiring crew viewed the replay and determined the ball had actually hit the dirt.

"We saw a couple different angles," Eddings said, "and if you watch it, the ball changes direction."

It is possible the ball ricocheted from the end of Paul's mitt into the pocket, but replays appeared to show a clean catch.

"I caught the ball," Paul said. "It was strike three. He was out…. It's not my fault. I take no responsibility for that whatsoever."

After his initial argument, Scioscia left the field, then returned after learning of the replay.

He appealed the call to third-base umpire Ed Rapuano, who would have had the best view of the pitch to the left-handed Pierzynski. After a short consultation with Rapuano, Eddings pointed to the ground, meaning they agreed, the ball had been trapped.


on the other hand.....it kinda reminds me of how dubya got in office the first place......................

harold pinter....

ok, so call me myopic........when i heard the announcement of the nobel prize for literature....i was shocked......because i thought he was an actor.......the guy who played sir thomas bertram in the most recent rendition of jane austin's mansfield park.......played it well, too......who knew he was a playwright.....?......an anti-war playwright...?.....and a screenwriter.....and a director........i say it was the austin connection that attracted the nobel committee...............it always comes down to jane.........of course, my interest in this year's prize was piqued by the abrupt resignation of a committee member.......still upset over last year's winner.......the following is an excerpt from her works, from the nytimes......

The New York Times
October 8, 2004
Excerpts From Novels by Elfriede Jelinek

Following are excerpts from novels by Elfriede Jelinek that have been translated into English: "Lust" (1989), translated in 1992 by Michael Hulse; "The Piano Teacher" (1983), translated in 1988 by Joachim Neugroschel; "Wonderful Wonderful Times" (1980), translated in 1990 by Michael Hulse; and "Women as Lovers" (1975), translated in 1994 by Martin Chalmers.

Every day the daughter punctually shows up where she belongs: at home. Mother worries a lot, for the first thing a proprietor learns, and painfully at that, is: Trust is fine, but control is better. Her greatest anxiety is to keep her property immovable, tie it down so it won't run away. That's why they have the TV set, which prefabricates, packages, and home-delivers lovely images, lovely actions. ... Time passes, and we pass the time. They are enclosed together in a bell jar: Erika, her fine protective hulls, her mama, The jar can be lifted only if an outsider grabs the glass knob on top and pulls it up. Erika is an insect encased in amber, timeless, ageless. She has no history, and she doesn't make a fuss. This insect has long since lost its ability to creep and crawl. Erika is baked inside the cake pan of eternity. ...

The comfy TV chair spreads its arms wide, the lead-in for the evening news plays softly, the anchorman stirs soberly above his tie. The side table sports an exemplary wealth of colorful bowls containing goodies and gumdrops, of which the two ladies partake, alternately or simultaneously. An empty bowl is promptly refilled; this Never-Never Land, where nothing ends and nothing begins. - "The Piano Teacher"
__________________________________________________

All around, oppressed people are falling, cascades of water, down steps and ornate porches into the uncertain consciences of their oppressors. Tame-spirited creatures that they are, they don't overshoot their mark. Every morning the boisterous radio bawls that it's time to get up, wakey wakey. And instantly the warmth of love is yanked away from under their feet and their sweat-soaked sheet taken from them. They grope about their wives, they dirty their precious belongings. Time breezes gently by. ...

Who can rival the senses for feeling pain? In rattling pots, with the steam lifting the lid to sing out, we cook our emotions. But what of those battered by the threat of redundancy? They bang their heads against the wall of the paper mill, which the mother company may have to write off because it isn't turning any profits. ..."The more profound people's happiness, the less they speak of it in these parts, so they don't lose their way in it and the neighbours aren't envious. Those who are cast out by the factory have to cast about for somewhere they can get credit from those on whose largesse and mercy they cast themselves. In the darkness dwell their lordsandmasters, the eagles, who can change their prey's fate with a single nod of the ballpoint. ... - "Lust"
__________________________________________________

what is it, that's shining there as bright as ripe polished chestnuts, heinz asks himself one day on the way to work. it is brigitte's hair, that has been newly tinted. ...

i love you, says Brigitte. her hair gleams in the sun like ripe chestnuts. ... i love you so much. that is the feeling of love this inescapable feeling. i feel, as if i had always known you, even in my childhood, which is long past. Brigitte looks up at heinz.

heinz too is immediately gripped by the feeling. apart from that he is gripped by a sensuality, of whose existence he has already heard.

it is new and terrifying at once. - "Women as Lovers"
__________________________________________________

Anna despises two classes of people: first, those who own their own homes and have cars and families, and second, everybody else. Constantly she is on the verge of exploding. With rage. A pool of pure red. The pool is filled with speechlessness that talks away at her nonstop. In her there is nothing whatsoever of a lass with a perm or a bobbing pony-tail listening to a hit in a record store and restlessly tapping her foot because the rhythm gets to her. ... What she talks about with her brother is of a philosophical or literary nature, but what speaks from within her alone is the language of the sounds produced by the piano. ...Autumn always did have a good deal on its conscience. Especially when someone still young in years is responding sensitively to it. Old people are forever thinking of death, young people do so only in autumn, the season of universal decay in the vegetable and animal kingdoms. ... - "Wonderful Wonderful Times"

Copyright 2004 The New York Times Company


she may be no austin......but few are.............

Wednesday, October 12, 2005

rebloom

ok, so my trellis rose (city of york) is reblooming........an occasion that i didn't fully grasp until i ventured out to get the newspaper at 6:40 am.....and the creamy white blossoms shown in the combined glow of the moon and the porchlight.......like beacons......quite a sight......for such a crisp fall morning.......rebloom is an occasion for this gardening family.......our bit of grace......city of york is not supposed to rebloom......so we attribute the 20-odd blooms to benevolence.......richly scented good fortune.....i must say....a subtle combination of lemon and cream.......ummmmmmmmm......at least that is the sentiment in the dawn's early light......before coffee has dripped and whilst one's glasses are still a might fogged from the temperature difference......might make a lively m.i.t. dissertation....solving the fogging of the spectacles during the early morning walk to the mailbox for the newspaper......would that be a physics problem....or chemistry......or...whatever...i would consider it nobel worthy....speaking of which...the nobel prize for literature is to be announced tomorrow amidst contraversy.......these intellectuals......there is something to be said for the mundane of a simple life without drama...............

the lottery ticket(s)

ok, so this morning, before i left on my adventure in wonderland(see the entry below)........my workmates took up a collection to buy mutual lottery tickets in hopes of sharing the $240 million pot.......and i smiled as a put in my $1......and never quite admitted to my $2/week lottery habit (wednesdays and saturdays...$1 each)........and this afternoon i left work with a photocopy of our 20 numbers....in case i wanted to stay up til 11 and watch the drawing.....like i am awake at 11:00pm......my theory has always been that if i won the lottery....they would be looking for me......with lots of local buzz that somebody closeathand had won big.......and so i only actually check my cache of tickets on a random basis.......folks around here have won in recent months......a lady at the county school systen down the street from where i work son $2 million......and stayed ont he job.......and another local couple won several hundred thousand with a ticket bought while waiting at the krogers........so if good things come in threes.......it is my turn........

alice in wonderland.....

ok, so today i was not where i was scheduled to be by general agreement, which freed up my time to do something i really didn't want to do......travel to yet another county's h. dept to check out where i will be doing yet another diabetes support group....this one is supposed to be temporary while the county in question hires a fulltime nutritionist..........the head nurse and the health educator at this site have the reputations as being meannerthansnakes......imagine my reluctance to agree to this, even temporarily.....but the group meets after usual business hours......and so i may never have to actually see these women......gentle readers, please understand that the notion of working with mean women is annoying, not intimidating.......i do believe that i could rise....i mean stoop to their level if need be.....but i wouldprefer to avoid confrontation if possible.......the interesting part of this story is not from the actual site visit.....it was from the drive to and from......this town a county over has a lovely tree-lined street with victorian mansions on either side....in varying levels of upkeep/decay......and as i was driving back towards the turnoff that would take me by the goodwill (yeah.....i never miss an opportunity for browsing.....) i chanced to see a well-dressed woman chasing an.....oversized white rabbit across the well-groomed lawn of one of the big houses......this is not something one sees everyday.......and i almost pulled the car over so as not to miss the spectacle of this woman on her knees trying to get the rabbit our from under the shrubbery......i could almost hear her hosery tearing and feel her stillettos digging into the turf.........an enigmatic touch to add to a story-line at some point......the white rabbit chased by the tall woman in heels and hose........could be freudian.....though nothing i have ever dreamed about.........enough of enigma.........i found a fine red linen dress....worth the stop, i'd say.............

Tuesday, October 11, 2005

thought for the day.....

ok, so my random thought for the day that appears on my opening screen is a classic line : If you can't say anything good about someone, sit right here by me.
- Alice Roosevelt Longworth.......i couldn't have said it better myself......

fall break.....

ok, so with the remaining child in our house on fall break.....i have the gift of extra time in the mornings to sip coffee.....and blog a bit....not so much rushing on days i do not have to drive a child to school in danville before going to work in harrodsburg....a pleasant interlude.......with only the caterwalling the animals wanting to be fed.......well, we cannot have everything, now can we......?

down to 4.....

ok, so last evening the angels knocked the stinkin' yankees out of the playoffs......and while this baseball season hasn't held quite the cachet of last years......there is still a curse to be broken and worthy opponents to duke it out on the field.........the white sox haven't been to the big dance since 1918.....so i say they are due....and they say they are due.........and while i may root for st louis to beat houston for the nl pennant......i will still be hoping that the white sox win it all.......just because

Monday, October 10, 2005

brideshead revisited

ok,so.....I have been watching brideshead revisited on vhs....borrowed a few tapes at a time from the library.....at least I was until this evening when I brought home a tape out of sequence ...rats...and so now...I am watching ocean's eleven while I cycle .....gotta do more than ride and blog.....but back to the 80's miniseries.....the undertones of homosexuality are so subtle......certainly not what it would be if made after 2000...the term never gets more specific than fairy....there is minimal physical
contact......neither is there much verbal intimacy....but yet the tale is compelling and classic.....and jeremy irons looks so young and innocent .....years before he played the father-figure in lolita......

1918

ok, so the report of the potential for a flu epidemic similar to the one in 1918 was chilling.....especially with the reports of just how unprepared the world is for such an event.....and the leaked report that the president's plan for controlling the epidemia involves the military.......the military.......like there will be riots?.......or will they simply be there to stack the bodies?........as i said...this report was chilling.......the 1918 flu business also touched close to home.....my dad's older brother donald died of the flu that year......one of the few times i can say that my family was touched by larger tragedy......none of my kin were killed in any of the foreign wars, for example.....but the uncle donald died in the flu epidemic.....tale has been part of family lore for as far as i can remember.......there is a quotation associated with it....there was an early family picture of my grandparents......my aunt dorothy is a young child, standing beside my pregnant grandmother who is holding donald.....and my grandfather crown stands behind her......the story goes that she wondered to herself at the time if she would raise them all.......the one standing beside her, the one on her lap, and the one she was carrying......and the answer was no....not donald.....and not tommy.......her last child who died of a brain aneurysm.....and then again, she also outlived vernon....who died of a massive heart attack in his late 50's.......but i digress from flu......flu is most easily prevented by fastigious handwashing.......and when one can't wash......use that cleansing hand gel........

Sunday, October 09, 2005

on beauty.....

ok, so i really like this passage....the beginning of chapter 3....A tall, garnet colored building in the New Enlgand style, the Belsey residence roams over 4 creaky floors. The date of its construction (1856) is patterned in tile above the front door, and the windows retain their mottled green glass, spreading a dreamy pasture on the floorboards whenever strong light passes through them. They are not original, these windows, but replacements, the originals being too precious to be used as windows. Heavily insured, they are kept in a large safe in the basement. A significant portion of the value of the Belsey house resides in windows that nobody may look in or open. .......i am really enjoying this book......it has that page-turner quality.....

reinventing the wheel......

ok, so our thoughtful houseguest took the time to clean up our hard drive and sweep for nastiness amongst our files.......which is all well and good save for the inconvenience of having to remember the addresses of my favorite internet sites.......i generally use the pulldown history to direct my routine scan of sites......true....the blessed machine is working so much faster......he also discovered that the firewall had been turned off....but there are some sites upon which i depended on the history...kind of like one is lost for phone numbers when one's desk blotter/calender has been renewed.......what was there is no longer there......i shall recover, i suppose......

Saturday, October 08, 2005

spiritual gifts......

ok, so i have been reading my sunday school lesson for tomorrow.......somehow i ended up with several weeks in a row to cover for my partner who is traveling.....and this has worked out o.k.........as these lessons tend to build upon material previously covered........and in this lesson the mother of two sons is bargaining with jesus about what role her boys will have in the kingdom when jesus comes to his glory......and it is sad that neither the mother nor the sons really understood what the kingdom meant.....nor that glory meant serving mankind rather than ruling over it....i can understand the position of the mm..wanting the best for her children.....knowing the breadth of their capabilities.......and in the course of the lesson i am to discuss such spiritual gifts.......those talents that are blessings......and as i sit here on a saturday evening......i am hard-pressed to name my own.......mostly....i can tell you things that do not come easily to me........for starts....i am not a telephone person..........in the very least....i do not like to call people on the phone.....those who are reading this blog who know me cannot recall the last time i called.......because i don't call........it is not a technology thing....it is a phobia of sorts.......i am especially hesitant to call people i do not know.....i have work backed up because the easy-access web pages i am to log-into are not acessible.......and the email i sent was returned with a phone number of somebody at a help desk.....and this email came last monday....and i have not called the number because i do not like to call.......freud could possibly explain my hesitancy.......and i do not especially like to answer, either..........caller i.d. is a gift from heaven in that regards............i can ignore the unwanted caller as many rings as is necessary....quite the irony, in that i wish for my children to call more often, but then there is an awkwardness on my part as i try to distill down all that has happened into a brief conversation..brief, because i am not good at long phone chats........but sometimes you just yearn to talk to your children.....this evening i picked up my cell phone to look up the cell number and/or the residential college number of my middle child.....the phone call went through from my front room.......gentle readers......cell phone calls just don't go through from our locale.....my middle child had to crawl into the house to get the kitchen phone to call 9-11 when our house was on fire because his cell phone had no service in our driveway..........but this evening........my cell phone was able to find out that his cell phone was not available........wow.......from our front room......and when he did call back it was a singular moment.......to be able to pass the phone around....and to chat a bit about books and classes.......and gifts.......i can say with authority that my children are gifted linguists........and i am in awe of this gift.......and i have seen firsthand that my eldest has become confident enough to walk right up to bobbie ann mason and introduce himself and me as if it were the most natural thing on earth to do.......and i am in awe of that bravura as well.......so what does this say about me....their mm........who lacks the gumption to call friend or foe......on the other hand...the child of mine who likes my dna can talk for hours with people she barely knows .....and she lives to call up anybody she can think of on any phone available to her.....i suspect that she would find pleasure in reading random names from the phone book.....over the phone.....if the moment at hand required such an act..........such is the extent of her gift..........ah well.....it is late......don't call me...i'll call you...........

houseguest......

ok, so there is something special about having one's child come home for the weekend........when such overnight stays haven't happened for awhile......the temptation is to pull out all of the stops...with food especially......to mother this child again for a few golden hours........it takes me back to the days when this child was first starting to talk....and we hung on his every word........yes, we do raise out children to move out into the world, fully capable of taking care of their own needs......but having the opportunity to have them back under one's wing for even a short time is priceless......

blessed are the cheesemakers......

ok, so one of the marvelous things about saturday mornings is the opportunity to read the nytimes and the washington post online.......this particular article i have borrowed because it seemed the perfect road trip for a cheese lover...... The New York Times
October 7, 2005
In a Land of Leaves, Seeking Cheese
By WENDY KNIGHT

THE cheese cave on the Major Farm near Putney, Vt., smells of earth and mold, with a faint nutty aroma. Dozens of wheels of sheep's milk cheese, each 10 inches in diameter, are lined neatly on shelves handmade from the farm's own ash trees. Their colors vary; molds adhere to the rinds, shading them in progressively darker hues over four months or so until, on a fully aged wheel, they take on the gray-taupe hue of a rustic French bread crust. The cave is cool, damp and peaceful.

Outside, in the clear days of fall, tourists roll noisily over the rural Vermont roads in the annual procession of leaf peeping, searching for the brightest golds, mustards and clarets. They stop to take pictures, to buy antiques and maple candy in village shops, to load up on apples and pumpkins at the farm stands. And, increasingly, they stop for cheese.

Artisanal cheese, handmade in small batches, is a growth industry in Vermont, with 35 cheesemakers sprinkled across the state and producing roughly 17 million pounds of specialty cheese - artisanal, farmhouse, organic - a year. Nearly half of them welcome visitors, and there is a meandering Vermont Cheese Trail, inspired by the long-established success of wine trails and, lately, their marketing offspring, from the Malt Whisky Trail in Scotland to the Robert Trent Jones Golf Trail connecting courses in Alabama.

Vermont's artisanal makers thrive on the growing sophistication of the American palate. "We've seen a much greater supply of artisanal cheeses from the U.S. in the past few years," said Vicki Wells, the executive pastry chef at Bar Americain, Bolo and Mesa Grill in New York. "I'm excited about them and the public is excited about them."

Artisanal does not have to mean small. The Cabot Creamery Cooperative, the state's largest artisan cheesemaker, produces 14 million pounds annually. Ms. Wells, who uses cheeses from around the globe, is particularly fond of Cabot's aged cloth-bound Cheddar, which she uses in Bar Americain's Vermont Cheddar scones. "It's the best Cheddar I've ever tasted," she said.

CABOT received 100,000 visitors to its two retail shops last year, in Cabot and Waterbury, up from 30,000 a decade ago. Not surprisingly, a large percentage of them came during prime leaf-peeping season. Nearly 25 percent of Cabot's sales occur in the four to six weeks between mid-September and the end of October, said Jed David, the company's director of marketing.

Major Farm, by contrast, is a small operation, selling 20,000 pounds a year. Its raw-sheep's-milk cheese, produced on 250 hilly acres in southeastern Vermont, is firm, with a smooth texture and an earthy taste. Called Vermont Shepherd, it wins accolades from cheese aficionados. But David Major, 44, who owns the farm with his wife, Cynthia, said success wasn't achieved overnight.

In the late 1980's, Ms. Major's father, who owned a milk-processing company in Queens, suggested that they milk sheep. "We made lousy cheese for a few years," Mr. Major recalled with a laugh. Then, in 1993, the Majors went to the Pyrenees to learn about cheese from French farmers.

"I learned that every location, every farm, every animal produces a distinct set of flavors in the cheese," Mr. Major said, "and if you're careful, you can capture that set of flavors in your product." Six months after their return, Vermont Shepherd was named Best Farmhouse Cheese by the American Cheese Society. (Farmhouse cheese is made with milk generated by a single farm's animals.)

On a warm September day, Mr. Major, wearing Carhartt shorts and a faded black T-shirt, traded his usual black Converse sneakers for rubber boots before entering the cheese cave. He had been up at dawn, milking sheep by 5:30 a.m. Usually he is busy with chores until evening, with the help of his cousin Lucy Georgeff and two other full-time workers. (His wife takes care of paperwork and marketing.) On Monday, Wednesday and Friday mornings from April through November, he makes cheese, which one can buy at the Majors' small farmstand at the driveway entrance to the property. The stand is self-serve and is open from 8 a.m. to 8 p.m. daily all year. A chalkboard often lets patrons know where they can look to see sheep grazing nearby. On open house days a few times in late summer and fall, outsiders can go deeper into the farm, touring the small cheesemaking house and the cheese cave.

About 15 miles north of Major Farm, the Grafton Village Cheese Company invites visitors to picnic on its lawn, next to a covered bridge in Grafton. Nearby are a steepled white church and restored 19th-century houses. The cheese factory is sizable, with 18 full-time cheesemakers producing one million pounds each year. But Grafton makes its cheese essentially as it has since 1892: slowly and meticulously by hand, using only milk from Jersey cows. The specialty is aged Cheddar. "We've taken a slow process and slowed it down even more," said Peter Mohn, a vice president at the company.

Visitors can watch the twice-daily cheesemaking through a large glass window in a viewing area adjacent to the company's retail store. A videotape of the whole process plays from a monitor in the corner, and articles about the company line the wall. In the store, cheese lovers can sample and purchase the cheese and other Vermont products.

One fall morning, Scott Fletcher, who has overseen cheese-making operations at Grafton for the last 38 years, was making sage Cheddar with two young cheesemakers. They lifted 50-pound slabs of curd to put them through a harp, a large cheesemaking tool made of stainless steel and monofilament that dices the slabs into cubes. The cubes were then salted and tossed into a 1,500-gallon vat with hand-rubbed Dalmatian sage. Mr. Fletcher reached into the vat and slowly turned the curds by hand, surveying the bounty before it was pressed into rounds and cured in a cooler.

Not surprisingly, Grafton Cheddar is a star ingredient on the menu at the nearby Old Tavern, built in 1801. Its silky Vermont Cheddar bisque is sublime, and the cheese also appears in the onion soup, omelets and mashed potatoes.

Still farther northwest, at the Taylor Farm in Londonderry, the specialty is Gouda; the farm's Maple Smoked Gouda took first place this year in the smoked cheeses/cow's milk category in American Cheese Society competition. Visitors are welcome on the farm anytime during the year. At cheesemaking time in the morning, they can watch the process through a large window.

Milk from the 5 a.m. milking of the farm's cows is pumped directly into a 465-gallon vat and mixed with the milk from the previous day. The milk is warmed to 92 degrees, and the cheesemakers add starter culture and rennet, an enzyme that coagulates the milk, transforming it to a firm, yogurtlike consistency. With one person on each side of the vat, the cheesemakers use harps to sweep through the curd, slicing it into cubes. Whey, a watery liquid, floats to the top to be drained off.

After the curd is formed into one-to-10-pound wheels, given a rest and placed in saltwater for 48 hours, it dries in a cooler for two weeks and then is aged for two months. The last step is shipping to specialty food stores and cheese shops.

Jon Wright, who owns the business with his wife, Kate, said the couple got into cheesemaking "out of desperation," after a precipitous drop in milk prices in the 1990's. Although many small farmers in Vermont were driven out of business as their sales failed to equal their costs, the Wrights were among a few who gave up selling milk and turned to cheese. "Cheesemaking is a means of preserving the working landscape and the farming lifestyle," Mr. Wright said. Last year, the farm sold 60,000 pounds of cheese, double the amount it sold in 1999.

On a September Saturday, after an impromptu tour of the barn with Pepper, the farm's pet sheep, Mr. Wright was manning the cash register at the farm's retail store, which draws about 4,000 visitors a year and generates at least $30,000 in sales. "What is that?" a customer asked, pointing to samples of cream-colored Gouda dotted with tiny green flakes that look like parsley.

"I was hoping you'd ask," Mr. Wright responded, and launched into a discussion about the traditional flavored Gouda, one of his favorites, made with nettle, a plant in the thistle family found in abundance on the farm.

Beyond the Wrights' southern pastures, the mixed hardwood forest was already showing a tinge of yellow. The freshly mowed hayfield smelled sweet. Waving his arm toward the field, Mr. Wright declared: "This is what makes good cheese."

For fall travelers on the road, it makes for good touring, too.

Friday, October 07, 2005

white sox......

ok, so the white sox beat the red sox to make it to their first pennant playoff since 1918....or 1917 or so.......and while i rooted for the redsox....they simply were not the team that played last year...at least in spirit.....and so i silently wished for the underdogs to prevail.....like cleveland.....or chicago.......al not nl, of course..........and so.....i have dragged out my grandpa's picture for this playoff series.....not because he was a chicago fan but because he was an al fan.........and now we will all gather round the television to cheer the white sox against the stinkin' yankees.....and cheer the al winner against the stinkin'.....what....braves/stlouis/whomever.........october is quite young when it comes to baseball...............

reviews before beauty......

ok, so when the mm ventured into the library for her weekly dose of media.....vhs/dvd/prose.....she certainly didn't expect to find a first-run novel recently reviewed by all major media outlets.......zadie smith's on beautyi only picked it up because it had been everywhere......and curiously...nobody else had picked it up.......nobody.........and why so...for such great reviews.....have the danville doyennes who buy first editions of great books just passed by....or are they elsewhere today...like keeneland for opening day...or further south.......who knows.....but i savor the first line..one may as well begin with jermone's emails to his father........i like first lines...they tend to be the last whole sentence i read........bare with me as i finish the remainder of this tome.....it is the weekend......and we have 2 full days for me to finish said tome.......but then......my eldest called....he is coming for the weekend....do we mind?..........omg.......a good book and a child home for the weekend......what a dilemna......

scientology strikes again.......

ok, so this scientology cult baffles me.....first there was tom cruise spouting off about how he could have cured brooke shields post-partum depression by faith rather than by medications......as if the guy has ever had to deal with post-partum depression firsthand.....he was unable to precreate during his first 2 marriages.....and now that he has induced his virginal fiancee katie holmes to do just despite her vow to remain pure until marriage...(clearly a cult that places little value on personal integrety)...tom cruise has gone so far as to insist that she go through the silent birth process as outlined by the cult of scientology........hmmmmm....silent birth.....plus no drugs.......and no one is allowed to speak to the infant for 7 days afterwards......as a way to allow the baby to recover from the trauma of birth........yeah, right.......as if this guy can control any of the above......i am shocked that a man who has never been in a delivery room can say with any assurance that his partner will be able to give birth silently...........or that she will resist the urge to coo to her own newborn for 7 days.......and that should she become hormonaly imbalanced afterwards that he will be able to cure her.........personally, i have declared a tom cruise boycott.......i have no desire to see such a demented soul on the big or small screen....it is the celebrity fostered by the public that has allowed him to believe that he can do all of these things.....omg....silent birth.......what will those crazy culties think of next............

Thursday, October 06, 2005

more on katrina......

ok so today is thursday....and i spent the day in typical thursday fashion....lent out to a sister health department miles from home.......but today would be less than usual........i had extraordinary encounters......some pleasant and others less so......lets begin with the unsavory.......i called the name a single client to come back to my humble thursday cubicle.....and half the room rose up to follow me.......oh no.......i have learned in my year in this position that as a gatekeeper i have only to serve the client...not everybody who chose to come to town with the client on that particular day.........and so i firmly halted the wave of moving bodies......and said to the client.....that i only needed her.....and that her 2 older children, and her mother and her spouse holding the hand of the toddler....that we would only be a minute and that i only had the one guest chair in a very small space.......that must not have set well with the spouse, for as we were finishing up the paperwork and rising from out chairs he had found someone to bring him back anyway and was forcing his way into my little space as we were coming out.....like there was something he was missing out on.......the nurse present in the hall told me later that abusers have a hard time with even 5-10 minute separations from their victims....like they will tell if allowed free rein........i found the experience chilling........but then there was the bright spot of my day....when i met with a pregnant mother and her 2 children, brought in by a host family who had driven all the way to louisiana to fetch them from a church shelter........when i weighed and measured the children, the mamma was quite upset that her toddler had lost weight since his last doctor's visit.....'from the ordeal'.....was how she explained it.......she related that her apartment had been damaged by a fallen tree.... and that she suspected that the landlord would pocket the money and not fix the place to allow for her return.....she was also concerned that the hospital that she was supposed to deliver in will not reopen due to flooding/storm damage.......she replied to my query that she and her children might just stay in kentucky for the near future........the host mamma and her daughter could not have been nicer, despite the bumper sticker on their van that read.......when we kicked god out of the classroom, the devil took over..............not necessarily a sentiment i agree with, but at least with this displaced family, their heart was in the right place........

Wednesday, October 05, 2005

more on miers

ok, so i considered a babel fish translation on the new supreme court nominee......but that would be too ironic...get it babel.....oh well...this is from salon.com'a war room....We scoffed when George W. Bush claimed yesterday that Harriet Miers is the most qualified person he could find for a job on the Supreme Court.

We weren't alone.

Sen. Trent Lott -- he's a Republican, remember? -- said today that Miers is "clearly" not the most qualified person for the job. In an interview with MSNBC, Lott said that there are "a lot more people -- men, women and minorities -- that are more qualified, in my opinion, by their experience than she is."

Although Republicans in the Senate have cast only a handful of votes against Bush's judicial nominees over the last five years, Lott insisted that he won't take a rubber-stamp approach with the Miers nomination. "I don't just automatically salute or take a deep bow anytime a nominee is sent up," he said. "I have to find out who these people are, and right now, I'm not satisfied with what I know. I'm not comfortable with the nomination, so we'll just have to work through the process in due time."

Lott's uneasiness is similar to concerns expressed yesterday by Kansas Sen. Sam Brownback, who said that the president's promises about Miers' "heart" aren't enough to assure him that she's sufficiently conservative on social issues. More moderate Republicans in the Senate will share their views on the nominee, at least in private, later today: The Gang of 14 that averted the nuclear option earlier this year will gather again to discuss the Miers nomination.

poisson de babel de jour.....

ok, so i liked this thought for today, from gertrude stein, who really did speak french.....La gratitude silencieuse n'est pas vraiment utilisation à n'importe qui

Tuesday, October 04, 2005

re: perseverance

ok, so this piece was in the daily telegraph.......i just love nobel stories..

Being a genius never comes easy

October 05, 2005

PHILOSOPHER Thomas Carlyle's assertion that "genius is an infinite capacity for taking pains" could have been penned to fit the work of Australia's latest Nobel laureates, Barry Marshall and J. Robin Warren.

What the 19th century thinker was alluding to, of course, was the necessity for "painstaking" attention to detail, for meticulous concentration and focus if one is to be ranked among the pantheon of acknowledged geniuses.

But the aphorism carries also the perhaps unintended idea of "accepting pain" as a price to be paid in the pursuit of one's life's work. Professor Marshall and Dr Warren qualify on both scores.

The dedicated researchers have both demonstrated a superhuman capacity for perseverance – and a capacity to risk real harm to themselves in their determination to prove the validity of their scientific theory.

It is difficult to overstate the significance – and the audacity – of their discovery. Working in gastroenterological research in the early 1980s, the pair observed sufferers of painful stomach and gastric ulcers were invariably infected with a particular strain of bacterium – helicobacter pylori – and they theorised that the bug was the cause of the illness.

To prove the theory to the sceptical medical establishment – which steadfastly believed ulcers were caused by stress – Professor Marshall actually swallowed a culture of the bacterium, duly contracted gastritis – and was cured with antibiotics. Case closed.

In fact, it took 10 years before the groundbreaking discovery was acknowledged, and it was not until about 1996 that the doctors' work was translated into an effective drug therapy for ulcer sufferers.

GPs now routinely treat ulcer sufferers with antibiotics and this once-intractable ailment is entirely curable.

In Australia, the majority of us readily accepts the accolade that we are citizens of "the clever country" even though we're scarcely smart enough to remember to put out the rubbish bin.

But Professor Marshall and Dr Warren are not of the majority. By temperament and by their accomplishments, they are true geniuses.

They inspire us and make us proud.

poissons de babel

l'ok, ainsi moi avaient lu un livre pendant ma heure de déjeuner aujourd'hui que j'ai oublié le livre, et ont trouvé l'amusement alternatif avec la traduction de poissons de Babel. ces affaires traduites de blog peuvent réduire le nombre de gens qui peuvent réellement lire ce passage encore, il peuvent inspirer vraiment le consacré de mes lecteurs doux éclater leurs dictionnaires français. mon matin a été lent. nous avons gardé la lumière de programme de clinique, comme nous offrons à des vaccins contre la grippe cette semaine. dans le passé nous avons eu des lignes de vieux gens attendant avant que nous nous soyons ouverts hors des portes... mais de non cette année. il n'y a aucun manque de vaccin prévu, et il y a eu ainsi moins de panique pour obtenir l'injection.... toujours, le livre que je suis lecture a lieu interne il dordogne, une région j'ai presque visité le dos de quelques années...... et l'espoir de visiter à un certain point dans un proche avenir.......i AM presque tenté pour conduire la maison et pour la rechercher... cas de.in d'un après-midi lent....

Monday, October 03, 2005


ok, so...this entry is from wonkette, who borrowed it from somebody else.....what is missing is harriet's only qualification for the job.....she has been quoted as saying that dubya is the most brilliant man she has ever met.....oy!.....even michelle malkin dissed her publically today...........A Legal Times profile of Harriet Miers upon her promotion from deputy chief of staff under Andy Card to White House counsel includes information not likely to show up on an official bio, among them:

? She is immensely, perhaps irrationally, into birthdays: "She always remembers everybody's birthday, and has a present for them. She'll be finding a present for somebody in the middle of the night.... 'Can't it wait until next week?' 'No,' she'd say, 'It has to be done now.'"

? She has dated Texas Supreme Court Justice Nathan Hecht "over the years." [NOTE: Absolutely no other article online mentions this fascinating fact.]

? She's nit-picky micromanager who failed upwards at the White House: "She failed in Card's office for two reasons," the [former White House] official says. "First, because she can't make a decision, and second, because she can't delegate, she can't let anything go. And having failed for those two reasons, they move her to be the counsel for the president, which requires exactly those two talents."

? Not even the president can think of much interesting to say about her: In 1996, at an Anti-Defamation League Jurisprudence Award ceremony, Bush introduced Miers as a "pit bull in Size 6 shoes," a tag line that has persisted through the years, in part because colorful anecdotes or descriptions about Miers are notoriously difficult to find.

We're not even that excited about the possibility of her being gay. Posted by Picasa

deleted blog........

ok, so i feel compelled to admit that i blogged a lengthy rant yesterday afternoon.....and then supressed it....as blogging software thoughtfully allows.......mostly because everything said was doneso in anger rather than after reasonable consideration......there are some things that can be thought but never said...........

ok, so i have come up with an early 50th birthday present to myself.......quite by chance........a nurse i work with is married to a german immigrant to came to this country by way of bolivia........don't even ask........and his 92 year old mother still lives there with 2 of his siblings......and at least once a year the couple go down for a few weeks to visit.......jackie has the most elegant maetrine jewelry that she had purchased there......for the non-gemstone savvy.....ametrine is a combination of amethyst and citrine.....both quartz-based gems....with the coloring dependent upon the amount of iron.....being a february person, i have been endowed with amethyst baubles over the years, ranging from juvenile to tacky.......and somehow skipping over elegant at every pass........so a few weeks ago, jackie asked if she could look for a piece of ametrine jewelry for me....if the price was right......i hesitated on having anyone pick out the right size ring....and so i authorized her to bring back an unset gem........emerald cut....if the price was right......and thus i now have in my posession a 7 carat ametrine that looks very similar to the one pictured....with no clue how much it will cost to make into a ring.......and this development begs more than one question.....as i already wear a ring on my right hand......a classic gold signet ring that i have worn so long that my initials...the original ones...have quite worn off........i wear this ring every day......mostly because it is simple....and not necessarily because the sorority sister who was my maid of honor gave it to me.......i am not so sure that i can just take it off and out it away after what.........27 years of continuous wear.........but back to my purchase......I have checked out similar stones online...and believe that my $50 investment in Bolivian ametrine is a reasonable move......i may just store the stone in it's little drawstring bag in the oak buffet in the front room.......i have told this tale before and i tell it again.....this buffet was in my grandmother crown's dining room.......and as long as i could remember until she passed away...there was a pouch of unset gems in the lefthand drawer...a ruby, a sapphire, and emerald.....each brought back by my uncle vernon, who spent most of wwII in india.......they stayed in the drawer despite the fact that he eventually gained a wife and 4 daughters.......who each might have treasured jewely made from those stones.......but with 3 stones and 5 females to please.....no wonder the gems languished int he buffet drawer.....no clue how they were finally distributed.......hopefully i will wear this gem.......for many years before it becomes an inheritance...... Posted by Picasa