finding neverland.....

ok, so this afternoon we watched....again....johnny depp in finding neverland......and it always ends the same way.....but yet i watch it again and again......this is such a wonderful film for the careful listener...for the tenderhearted....for the mother of boys.......for fans of peter pan.......not the disney homogenized version...but for the televised one that starred the woman playing a boy.....i cannot recall her name ot save my soul.......but we watched it every year when it came on again......for the record, gentle readers....i do believe in fairies......

cold feet

ok, so this is not a blog about the runaway bride from georgia who ended up in police custody in new mexico...this blog is about....well....cold feet.....this downward turn on the temperature has posed a problem in so many ways....gardening setbacks, the decided lack of a lower fuel bill for march......and then there is the physical discomfort.......way back when we had the lovely heat wave.....remember that?....i got out of the habit of wearing socks to bed.....i would end up stripping them off sometime during the night anyway......and so this morning, when i got up to laze about....and do chores here and there.......let me enumerate......i did 3 loads of laundry, cleaned out a closet, and tidied up......not really a lazy morning....but the point is this...i never bothered to get dressed....and thus i found myself at 1:00 pm......with cold feet.....and rather than shower and warm up...i chose to go back to bed......oh...the joy of a saturday so unplanned that one can go back to bed for a nice nap......except.........that one cannot sleep well or long with cold feet......and though the dresser with all of the socks...matched or otherwise is but 8 feet from the bed......i resisted the saner part of my brain, which screamed.....socks,socks,socks........and instead cuddled up in a vain effort to warm up......and thus the nap that wasn't shivered along until 3:00, when i was finally cold enough to get up, take a hot shower, and get dressed...socks and all.....gosh...i feel so cozy in my sweat pants and longsleeve t-shirt....and socks.....i am not worthy of such delights.......but back to that runaway bride......14 bridesmaids?......what was she thinking..........

ok, so i was amused to read this online today.... U.S. Representative Rush Holt (D-N.J.) joined nearly 200 protestors outside Frist Campus Center (on Princeton campus)this afternoon, traveling from Washington, D.C., to participate in a student-run filibuster that has garnered national attention as it continues into its fourth straight day.

Holt read from Aesop's Fables in a symbolic protest of a push by Senator Majority Leader Bill Frist '74 to change Senate rules to make it more difficult for Democrats to block judicial nominees.

"You might have noticed a theme from the fables," Holt said. "Be careful what you wish for."

It was the same selection Holt's father, Senator Rush Holt (D-WVa), read to block a coal industry regulation bill in 1936. 

honestly old.....

ok, so last night at dinner at the lexington hotspot.......well...it might not have been hot, per se......but it was hotter than where i usually am at that hour......i made the comment that 'i don't get out enough...'.....or something similar......i edit my own thoughts so frequently for publication that i can rarely remember anything with precision..........i was asked what that meant.....and the supposition was that it had something to do with the clientele in our dining area......a mishmash of couples/genders and levels of pdofaffection.......no...i don't think that is what prompted my comment.....more....it was the trying to keep up with the conversation at an hour when i am usually in the bathtub or infront of the computer...or in bed........i felt out of my element.......and likely my dining companions wished i was back in my element.......the presence of somebody's mm is generally not on the top 10 things that young people require for a good time.....and so this morning i have mixed feelings about having gone.......they would have had a better time had i stayed home.......but i really wanted to hear the songbird.....and so i invited myself along......please forgive me.......wit, and tosca....and middle child.......i had a good time in spite of being your 4th wheel.......

7:57 am......

ok, so the phone rang at 7:57 am......startling when the phone rings whilst one is deep in sleep....there is a passing indecision on the nature of the sound...until the slot machine-part of the brain rolls up a trio of pink telephones.....and the connection between the sound and its origin is made......'is c.c. there?...'......omg...it is genessa (sp).......whose indisctinct diction grates upon my ears......i struggle to hear....but that is all she ever really says when she calls at incredibly inappropriate times......7:57 is no the earliest she has called.......on christmas day the wakeup call came much earlier....but i digress......i recall being awake most of the night.......off and on from when i ducked under the covers at precisely 11:05....just back from a harrowing drive back from lexington in the pouring rain.....late night driving, in the rain, when one is tired is such a bad idea......especially on the curvy road that is the straightest route to the house and therefore to my bed...i had made the trip earlier in the evening for a special occassion...to see the senior recital of our favorite songbird......i must come up with a better moniker.......she is certainly too precious for such a vague term....skylark?.....she is really the bird expert...i should consult her on the best and the brightest of the songbirds.......the event was held in a downtown church with no parking lot...i only mention this because i had pulled into an apretment complex with clearly marked reserved spots for tenants....and though i did check the slot i chose for reserved markings.....i did fear during the performances the reality of a towed vehicle.....oh vey....again i digress........there were a handful of seniors.....mostly young women......their voice teacher accompanied on the grand piano when a senior piano major did not.....and the first songstress up was.......sweet, but with a voice much too thin for the song she chose......the sort of voice one needs in a chorus.....but certainly not one for the big solo in any production........the kind of voice that requires a microphone......gentle readers....voice recitals arenot/shouldnot be electronically enhanced.....it would be wrong.......and so i began to feel a certain unease.....like there would be more of the same as we made out way down the list of selctions.....always a foreign language piece followed by something in english......and the quality of the voices managed to go downhill....from the thin to the vaporized.......omg......how can these women actually go on to study voice when they have the will but not the instrument for such endeavors......that is until our songbird got up to sing.......bona vox......good voice.........a huge voice is more accurate......a voice that passers-by could probably hear.....clear, richly toned......wow.......that is the voice of someone going to oberlin converatory......and as it turns out, few of her classmates are actually going on to study music...that had merely been my assumption.......and when it was over we went back out into the rain, along with another of my son's special friends.......i shall call her wit for blogging purposes.....in search of something to eat.......the restaurant chosen by our songbird was somewhat ridden hard and hung up wet......nobody at the front door.......i offered to our group my supposition that the hostess had earlier thrown up her hands and stomped off in some midlife crisis....as that is probably what i would have done myself under the circumstances........we were finally hydrated, and fed.......over humerous banter.....i was likely in the company of three of the most talented young people in central kentucky......and thinking back i must say that it is so serendipitous that they know each other so well now......and will be able to look back fondly as having known each other...when they are each famous for doing what they do best......but back to the wakeup call.........7:57 am was not the first time i looked at the clock in disbelief.....nope...that moment came at 3:30 am when the manual alarm clock went off....and then the clock radio came on with bbc news.......and my spouse leaped out of bed.......time to get up to drive himself, our middle child....and a centre student staying over....to louisville to run the derby festival minimarathon.......in the cold, cold rain, i might add.........i tried to go back to sleep.....but sleep does not come easily when one can smell the brewing coffee....and hear the thunps and squeaks of people trying to get themselves out the door and on the road.......8:47 am....the phone rings again.....'is stephan there?...the caller asks sweetly.....no?....this is dawn...please let him know that the nhs carwash has been cancelled.......'......gentle readers,...this last bit of information was thrown in just for the reading pleasure of those who will remain unnamed.......but hey...it is still so very early......and i might just take the newspaper back to bed with me.......i have already had a pretty big day.........

the end of april....

ok, so there are no roses due to bloom any moment in my garden......and this is most vexing..........i always have a rose in bloom by the april 30....albiet a small bloom on a bush in a most protected spot......but neough to call it in bloom....and i traditionally call my brotherinlawnicktherosarian to gloat, or at least to find out if her also has a rose or two in bloom.....and it is a nice day allaround.....except for this year....what with the cold snap and lack of sunshine that has plagued us these many weeks.....there is a chance that the sun could come out for a time tomorrow afternoon......though the temperatures will not get above 58 i am told..........i will just hav eto bundle up to get the last of the beds ready and the few seed packets we have purchased sewn......

snows of Kilimanjaro

ok, so i had to make a split second decision last night.....watch the president's fictional accounts of the way that he sees the progress his presidency is making in foreign and domestic arenas.....or watch an old movie based on a short story by ernest hemingway.......and i chose ernest...because at least he was upfront about his fiction ebing partly autobiographical .....the film, which was actually co-written by ernest...starred gregory peck.....looking and acting unlike atticus finch.....and ava gardner and susan hayward........it is told in a series of flashbacks.......and one has to listen very carefully for the title to be explained....one had to listen very carefully to understand most of what was going on.....ernest is obtuse in that way.......and now i will have to dig up the short story for an overdue reread.....to see just what ernest himself was willing to change in order to get credit was a screenplay writer.......and mr. bush's fiction......maybe he is trying just as hard to get credit as a screenwriter....in his own way

those were the days, my friends....

ok, so i missed my sons today so badly it hurt.......not the sons i have now......at their current ages.....but my sons the way they once were...at ages say....3 and nearly 1........when they were still cuddly and impressionable.....and precocious....well...they are still precocious...but....you know what i mean....i miss the getting-up-in-your-lap-to-snuggle days....the wanting-to-read-just-one-more-chapter-before-bed days........the let's-put-together-a-puzzle days.......gosh......those days went by so fast.....and in the midst i was so tired and cranky with working fulltime and tryinbg to be the perfect mother.....and wished it would go by so fast....and do not we always rue the day when we get what we wish for........

alias....

ok, so i see where this show is headed.......after 4 years of chasing a medieval alchemist/genius who discovered a fountain of youth elixir......the heroine's father is sick with radiation poisoning......and he is in need of said elixir.....and she will finally solve all of the collective riddles in order to find it...to save his life.....and just whether this discovery will happen at the end of this season....or be a haert-wrenching cliff-hanger til next season is anybody's guess.....the show's new season was postponed til january due to 'low' ratings.....which abc calls any show less than american idol....a show that we do not watch because it is insipid......the watching of a competition that so involves backbiting/blatantly nasty criticism/and while the heartwrenching personal stories of passionate commitment to song are tearjerking....they do not make up for the negatives...at least for me.......which is why i so like alias......it is a thinking person's soapopera.......little clues come at you week to week along with the major plot-driving ones......i just love this show.....and i fear that abc will not renew for season 5.....leaving our cliffhanger father with radiation sickness that close to salvation......omg......i cannot imagine getting that close and not knowing how it ends.......

celebs......

ok, so my life pales by comparison........no photos of us covorting on african beaches......no $500,000 engagement rings......no nanny breach of confidentiality.......no christmas eve fights in front of the help........no dashing out from the trainer's under a hoodie......no trials for sleeping with/fondling of underage boys........gosh.........gosh, how have i kept my secret life so.....well......secret......i walked this morning with my favorite front-office clerk....and when i asked her what she thought of the jacko trial...she just rooled her eyes......why would i bother to follow it when i know he is guilty.......'stink just stays around when there is crap'........gentle readers.......that is a quote for the ages.......from a good old country girl.......and i could not agree more........gossip may come and inference and inuendo may go....but where there is stink, there is usually poop.......loads of it........and though none of these issues are any of my personal business.....the beckhams nanny case has it right......when people portray themselves as a perfect couple to sell a brand ...then all bets are off........the notion that a marriage can be a brand is curious........in that all marriages go through any number of phases of coziness, contempt, and complacency.......all reasonable in their own context....and certainly nobody else's business....but when you feel that you are just too important/busy to do your own laundry/childcare/whatever....then what you say or do or leave around for public view will come back to haunt you.......the folly that the beckhams have that arguing in front of the nanny who signed an agreement would stay private is just that...folly.......and i have no sympathy for either of them......and little more for jacko.....who seems to think that if he can prove the mother of his victim to be a chisler then he will get by with fondling of the chisler's son......that is precisely why he chose such a victim.....someone whose parent could not stand up to the cross-examination in court........this is the mm version of couch-potato quarterback....we know all of the plays and take none of the risk.......thank the lord for small favors.....those are risks that i have not the balls to take.......

blind dates......

ok, so the mm reads with nostalgia the hype about bruce springstein's new acoustic album release...the mellow, relaxed, and calm bruce springstein.........i once saw bruce springstein in concert...from the 3rd row.....just after the release of born to run...way back in 1980 or so...maybe 1979...i was comfortably numb with many of the lesser details of my life back then......it was a blind date.....with somebody quite forgettable from the beta theta pi house.....i went as a favor to my anatomy lab partner...she who kept very good notes...her boyfriend's roommate needed a date...would i go?......one doesn't say no to the roommate of your lab partner's boyfriend when one is working parttime, and going to school, and attempting to be a feeble sorority member....and......well...you know.....i was unspeakably irresponsible that year.......and bruce's concert kinda sums it all up........bruce and his band were wired for sound.....jumping everywhere......hyped up......it was a great show.....and i can recall the shock and dismay that my date displayed that i was not more grateful for such a good time......well, there are things one will not do for one's anatomy lab partner, her boyfriend or the boyfriend's roommate.......i will admit to going out with this fellow once more.....to a toga party...and it was more of the same.....expectation of gratefulness...ha!....and it was a very cold night.......and when he brought me back to my apartment...and my key broke off in the lock because it was so cold.....he just said good night and turned and walked away.......luckily i had the keys to my car (such as it was).....and was able to locate a roommate.....in yet another fraternity house.....and her boyfriend had a lighter....and tweezers.....and he cooked the lock, and plucked out the key.......and they went back out into the night......ah...what memories that bruce evokes......not much regarding actual lyrics,....or melodies.......but the emotions....and recallections of seamier behavior.......wow....there is nothing like bruce...........

pleased with protests....

ok, so this morning i read with glee that students at princeton protested bill frist and his filibuster fight......in front of the building he donated to the university...the large student center.......known simply as frist......there were a few glitches to student dissent....as they had no prior arrnagement with frist to protest frist......and campus police showed up to escort the crowds away.....but cooler heads prevailed and the necessary signatures to the protest application were obtained.....and the democratic system was allowed to continue as it had originally erupted......a grassroots protest against the bullies in power who foolishly believe that they will always be in power just because they happen to be sitting at the top at this very moment......the republicans will rue the day they changed filibuster rules.......

take your child to work day.....

ok, so yesterday was not the official take-your-child-to-work day...but i did anyway.......he was in need of 14 hours of shadowing....and his first choice fell through.....and so he observed a counseling session for a woman with high cholesterol, a wic certification visit for a newborn infant who was not present because of the cold rain......by a relative who was not well-informed.......later he went out with the enviornmentalist to inspect a school cafeteria and playground.....and met with our visiting nurse who had just attended a training on methamphetamine......a nice variety of experiences.......he comes back for part of today.....hopefully something interesting will come along.......

cannot stop grinning.....

ok, so this nytimes piece came through professional email...

The New York Times
April 24, 2005
OP-ED COLUMNIST
Living Longer Is the Best Revenge
By DAVID BROOKS
http://www.nytimes.com/2005/04/24/opinion/24brooks.html?

The release of a report in The Journal of the American Medical
Association indicating that overweight people actually live longer than
normal-weight people represents an important moment in the history of
world civilization. It is the moment when we realize that Mother Nature
- unlike Ivy League admissions committees - doesn't like suck-ups.

It turns out she doesn't like those body-worshiping, multi-abbed marvels
who've spent so much time at the bench press machine they look as if
they have thighs growing out of either side of their necks. She doesn't
like those health-conscious rice cake addicts you see at Manhattan
restaurants ordering a skinned olive for lunch and sitting there looking
trim and fit in their tapered blouses while their buns of steel leave
permanent dents in the upholstery.

Mother Nature, we now know, is a saucy wench, who likes to play cosmic
tricks on humanity. If the report from researchers at the National
Cancer Institute and the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention is
correct - and it is the most thorough done to date - then it seems that
Mother Nature has built a little Laffer curve into the fabric of
reality: health-conscious people can hit a point of negative returns, so
the more fit they are, the quicker they kick the bucket. People who work
out, eat responsibly and deserve to live are more likely to be culled by
the Thin Reaper.

I can't tell you how happy this makes me. Since I read about this report
a few days ago, I haven't been able to stop grinning.

I've been happy because as a member of the community of
low-center-of-gravity Americans, I find that a lifetime of irresponsible
behavior has been unjustly rewarded. If this study is correct, I'll be
ordering second helpings on into my 90's while all those salad-munching
health nuts who have been feeling so superior in their spandex pants and
cutoff T-shirts will be dying of midriff pneumonia and other
condescension-related diseases.

I've been happy because now there will inevitably be a shift in the
fashion winds, favoring members of the Zaftig Corps. Sports enjoyed by
people with Rubenesque proportions, like floating, will come into vogue.
More people will appreciate the thigh-rubbing musical rhythms you hear
when overweight people wear corduroys. More people will realize we
should all be patterning our lifestyle decisions on those made by
Christopher Hitchens.

Mostly, I'm happy on an existential level. I like to be reminded that
the universe is basically crooked. This is what the zero-tolerance
brigades and all the better living gurus never quite get. They're busy
trying to mold everybody into lifelong valedictorians, who spend their
adulthood as carb counters and responsible flossers - the sort of
organized folk who actually read legal documents before they sign them.

In reality, life is perverse and human beings don't get what they
deserve. The people with the worst grades start the most successful
businesses. The shallowest people end up blissfully happy and they are
so vapid they don't even realize how vapid they are because vapidity is
the only trait that comes with its own impermeable obliviousness system.
The people regarded as lightweights, like F.D.R., J.F.K. and Ronald
Reagan, make the best presidents, while you - so much more thoughtful
and better read - would be a complete disaster.

Life isn't fair, logic is of limited value and, as Woody Allen observed
years ago, everything your parents once thought was good for you turns
out to be bad for you: sun, milk, red meat and college.

The chief moral lesson I take away from this report is that Mother
Nature is happy to tolerate marginally irresponsible misbehavior. She
doesn't want you to go completely to seed. If you're truly obese and
arouse hippos when you visit the zoo, you could still punch your ticket
at any moment.

But she does want you to eat the occasional Cinnabon, so long as it
isn't bigger than Delaware. She wants you to have that fourth glass of
wine, and lecture the dinner table on the future of the papacy based on
your extensive reading of "The Da Vinci Code." She wants a little
socially productive mediocrity.

Darwin was wrong when he talked about the survival of the fittest: it's
really the survival of the healthy enough to get by. As it says in the
Good Book, the last shall sometimes be first, the meek shall inherit the
earth, and the chubby will get extra biscuits at the breakfast buffet.



ok, so the other memorable thing that woody allen said had to do with weight loss....he said and i paraphrase..... that when one loses 10 pounds...how can one be sure that it isn't one's best 10 pounds...the part with all of the humanity.....food for thought......i believe this calls for a glass of wine.....and a few pieces of cheese.....

tosca.....

ok, so the mm is in the mood to hear a little fine music friday evening...and has heard that there may be such a recital in lexington.......could the songbird in question provide the time and place so i can make plans.....are reservations/tickets necessary?.....the schubert?.......vissi d'arte?.......memories?.......i am sure you could do justice to the song, too.......

baltimore versus boston....

ok, so between blogs i am amusing myself with an on-line soundfree broadcast of the 1st in a series of 3 baltimore versu boston games.....for the record...baltimore is off to a strong start....with boston nipping at their heels...and the nyyankees in the cellar......tonight....baltimore has the upper hand.......at least at this bottom of the 7th moment...i wonder who sings God bless America at their 7th inning stretch...that is one of the problems with on-line telecasts...they never tell me what i want to know......like who sang the national anthem.....and what did they wear........and was ben affleck there with jennifer garner......

salt of the earth

ok, so this evening i gave a talk at a singles group sponsored by the local baptist association in the county where i work.....i say singles with a grain of salt....as there was nobody in the room below the age of 65....and yet they were all without partners.......15 women....2 men......all wanting to hear a message about eating better.....the event was a potluck.....and the fare ranged from a jar of mini-gherkins...to spinach dip and triscuits.....to meatballs in sauce...to several fruit trays....and the comments were to be expected.....was i going to watch what each person selected.....i said no...but i could not help but notice the woman directly in front of me with a plate of pie and skittles.......no fruits, vegetables, protein...or dairy......just pie and little colored candies......but i digress........i did not come to this event alone.......no....for one time only i was accompanied by my shadow.........my middle child required to shadow some working adult for 14 hours over 2 days.......and we were so very vague....this was not a crowd who would quite appreciate the ins and outs of my middle child's post-high school plans......and so when asked what he planned to do after danville high...the answer was 'i don't know what i want to study'.....which is true.......the group must have asked me 6 times to go through the 'line' first...but i never eat before speaking in public...and demured emphatically.......it was all i could do to not take complete control of this group......who were missing 'brother' whatever..the leader of this band of baptists........off doing a revival...they were clearly at a loss as to how to proceed without a guiding hand.......and so i just leaped in when there was a lull......and presented my tried and true points......like any preacher worth his salt........with an emphasis on eating breakfast, at least 5 fistfuls of fruits/vegetables a day.....an walking at least 10,000 steps a day....all very positive can-do messages....nothing negative.........and when i was through...i filled a small bowl with the remaining pickles...a bit of spinach dip and triscuits....and we were on our way home to fix a real supper.......so what was the lesson?.........i will admit to pandering to my audience with a comment about the reality of health-wielding antioxidant fruits/vegetables being highly colored and desirable.....that it was no accident but a carefully scripted plan wrought by a benevolent maker.......the most laughs of the evening came when i explained that though my child was shadowing i had no illusions about him choosing a nutrition sort of life......ha!....nutrition is the mainstay of the landgrant colleges....not the ivy league......nutrition is salt of the earth.....make no mistake.....but nutrition is just the path i made do with.........i am like the legions of american parents who wish better for their offspring...........

what goes around......

ok, so i have raw feelings about the gop come-to-jesus to-do that the extra-right folks held in louisville at the megachurch......i have seen this coleseum form the outside....and it is massive....like a shrine to sports rather than to God...and the faithful gathered there yesterday evening....along with a video of mr frist........and mr frist...he who has a building named after him at princeton....that mr frist.....did not go so far as to say that the faithful should roast errant judges over the coals......not so far as mr delay has gone...but he did say that the filibuster should be abolished.....so that the evil democratic liberal gang of hoodlums can no longer block the righteous bush-nominees from their deserved judgeships........filibuster......a method of restraint traditionally used to buy time for the underdogs....and allow time for reason to take hold.......for the insanity to diffuse and subside.....the fillibuster is a good thing.....and a tool that the republicans may wish they still had when they are no longer in power.....which could be in less than 4 years......what goes around comes around.........every time.......ironically, the judges that mr frist is so distressed about are reagan appointees........those that mr bush is so determined to have approved may not pan out the way he hopes........not all his appointees or wannabees play out the way that he plans......bolton looks to be self-distructing over his own misdeeds....ones that bush cannot make go away........what goes around, comes around every time......

b-o-l-o-g-n-a

ok, so this newsrelease on cnn.com really tickled me.....Customs agents protecting the U.S. border with Mexico found and destroyed more than 800 pounds of bologna hidden under clothes in a man's suitcases, the Department of Homeland Security said Monday.
The man planned to sell the food at a local swap meet, but agents caught him April 4 when his bus en route to Albuquerque, New Mexico, reached a checkpoint north of Las Cruces, New Mexico, the department said in a written statement........ for starts....why bologna of all things......if mexican bologna was cheaper...maybe he thought he could make a profit...buy low sell high.......but wasn't he at all concerned about food poisoning........bologna on a bus.......ouch...that sounds like a recipe for a bacterial bombshell...i wonder if the sniffing dogs found it first thing...maybe the sniffing dogs were following the bus...like bloodhounds tracking their prey......and 800 pounds.....wow.....this guy must have thought he could amke a really big killing in the illegal lunchmeat trade.......that is 800 packages of bologna.......a lot to hide in a few suitcases..........ah well......any amusement on a monday......

college of cardinals.....

ok, so i must be living under a bridge...for i was shocked on the way home from church to have the history of the college of cardinals recapped on npr during my drive home from church...including the part where the college used to be known as the inquisition.......this is distressing news.....that the new pope's former job...in another age....would be in the torturing of heretics....or at least those who had doubts as to the validity of notions held to be gospel by the catholic braintrust........sadly.....my current fear is that there are right-winger who miss the old ways of torturing heretics....and would happily resign us evil liberals to the rack or the cahterine wheeel until we renounce our wicked ways........i shouldn't spread that idea too far or wide.....as tom delay seems bent on punishing all who are in his path to political posterity.........

sunday night......

ok, so i believe that if friday afternoon is the timeframe most full of optimism and promise....then sunday evening is the most depressing and angst-ridden.... all that was not done that could have been/should have been....and wasn't done at all...heavy sigh........and then there is all that is coming up on monday, tuesday....and on through friday afternoon......i did get a lot done...what with my successful foray into lexington........and i did get some tidying up done.....and some laundry done......but what about the other 24 hours of the weekend.......what about those......i even spent some quality time with my spouse...tidying up my mother's house while she is gone......mostly we recycled her old magazines, catalogs......and put together a box of paperbacks to take to the library for their fundraising resale.......all of the things we felt we could do without prior approval.......plus we swept and washed....and changed sheets....and things that are harder for her to do before and after her surgery.....alas....as my own meanmamma is the consumate packrat...i really fear for the reality of her demise....when i shall order the largest trashbin and heave it all....well....i do not really mean that...i will probably just pay the salvation army to haul off everything left after i remove precious memories........had i the address i would have sent the wool fabric off to the balkans myself......she has really good intentions.....sending here wook fabric to cold climates.....though i am not sure how valid this need is...or if there is a destination should it be sent......i did bag up the strips of fabric that she occassionally rolls as bandages for haiti......they are so far from sterile that the haitians would likely sue us if used......and when she complains i will simply blame it on an error in communication between me and my spouse.....he must have taken the wrong bags to the dump........ah well, gentle readers...here is hoping that your collective weekends were productive.....and that your sunday evening is calm, relaxing and guilt-free............

the spring chill....

ok, so the weather has turned so cold that there was palpable sleet spitting forth as i walked up to the road to get the newspapers......snow for gosh sakes.....in late april.....and the cold wind goes right to one's very bones......of course...these weather conditions did not prevent me from waking up in a pool fo sweat last night.......so annoying and so far so continuing........and then i got cold....and couldn't get back to sleep......what with a dream about being in a hotel room that had a garage for the car.....and we were going to go to breakfast, but we worried that the garage door wouldn't open after we turned in our key.....so we were packing up and moving out the car first....what is that all about?........why would i bother to dream about something so tedious...not even any special details included this time...like what was for breakfast, or what color were the sheets.....just plain facts that made no sense........maybe it was the cold night that shivered out all of the best embelishments.......so......being sunday morning and all i had best work on my sunday school lesson...and get ready for church....reckon it is ok to wear longjohns.......?

lotr......

ok, so it was a a cold and rainy day...perfect to watch the 3rd installment to lotr.......though i do admit to ff through the tedious climbing up the rock wall parts.....there are still so many really good lines......'i am no man'......maybe the best line ever uttered in a motion picture......and i must admit to tears when frodo and bilbo sail off to the place across the sea....or wherever they are going......it doesn't matter, i suppose......where heaven is.....as long as it is golden and painless.....and low calorie

nyy

ok, so i almost feel sorry for the nyy.....at the bottom fo their division with a record of 7 wins 11 losses........the highest paid palyers ever on the face of the planet....and they cannot seem to put together a rally to dig themselves out of the hole.........well...i almost feel sorry for them........

camp nelson military cemetary

ok, so i stopped on the way back from lexington to visit my dad.......or rather...to search for his headstone amongst the others in rows that look exactly the same......i remember the general location...but the rows are filling in....as they will in times of war, i suppose.....and this time i had to walk around a bit in the wet grass before i found it.....and noted that a grave in the vicinity had recently been altered....the wife's name and dates were on the back of it....i wondered how that worked and now i know......i felt ashamed that i had not thought ahead to bring flowers....to arrive emptyhanded seemed cheap and ungrateful for a father that never arrived emptyhanded to visit me....i really miss my dad, especially in the spring when he would give gardening advice on the phone.....i still feel guilt when i fail to put the weedandfeed on the lawn in march.........the lexington trip was a post-earthday sweep of our favorite goodwillstores.......our little way of reducing and reusing.......found lots of things for cayle and for our eldest.....in fact......the structure and perry ellis and lauren and izod items i found for andrew are just fabulous considering the price........i also made a few early graduation and birthday gift purchases......i do not often travel to lexington....and one must look ahead toward events in the offing...especially for folks who deserve better than an impersonal check.......and i bought myself a really neat set of picture albums.......maybe i can make myself organize the volume of photographs into some semblence of order sometime soon.........or maybe not....and i can just put the albums on the shelf and pretend they are complete.........

to sleep...perchance to dream....

ok, so i slept 2 full hours past the time that a) i usually get up to get ready for work and b)past the time that my spouse got up to run......there is something intrinsically delicious about being able to roll over and go back to sleep...especially so fi the day is rainy and cold......and the dreams one has in those interludes tend to be crazy.....this installment was about me visiting my first ever boyfriend and his current wife and family (current is the wrong word...he has been married as long as i have....)and yet in the dream he asked me why i was still wearing his wedding ring.....like we had been married and divorced...and that i had failed to move on.....and the dream had something crazy to do with him not being able to get his telephone connected because he still owed me alimony (which is really wild because i can't see me every accepting such go-away payments....)and at some point i was taking the red nail polish off of my toes.......like that had enything to do with the storyline......and my estranged sibling was in the dream...something about how this person could get away with anything.....i must explain, for the record, gentle readers that much as i was fond of this person......and much as i mourned for far too long when he dropped me for my best friend......i cannot believe that i really hold deepseeded regrets for the loss of that relationship......not when our breakup eventually led to me meeting my own special spouse.......i have long fantasized about running into said ex-bestfriend...and thanking her......she used to be a red-head.....and by now she could have snow white hair......redhair tends to fade quicker than darker hair.....that would be good for my ego......curious details....in my dream the new wife was talking about ann coulter was a bleached-blonde, boney, cigarette smoking poster girl for all that is wrong with america........now that is something we can all come together over.........

baked alaska....

ok, so i really enjoyed the ben and jerrys protest against drilling in anwar....WASHINGTON (CNN) -- Citing fears that the U.S. government may allow oil drilling in the Arctic National Wildlife Refuge, about 100 protesters sought to melt their opponents' arguments with a Capitol Hill rally Friday featuring a gigantic baked Alaska.

Ben & Jerry's, the ice cream company known for its activism, was one of the sponsors. The Alaska Wilderness League also helped organize the demonstration.

"This is not going to last very long, just like the Arctic National Wildlife Refuge, if you drill up there," said Arnold Carbone, one of the creators of the mammoth frozen treat and a "flavor guru" at Ben & Jerry's. a 900 pound baked alaska...i wish i had thought of that.......

bonsai kittens....

ok, so one of the baser stunts that mit students played was called bonsai kittens...which propsoed that cats could be grown into special shapes if forced into plexiglass forms when small...like kittens....and grown into cats inside the forms......really nasty...when you think about it...i will never think about my bonsai the same way again......

louise gluck...

ok, so i read on line this poem by louise gluck......it is her birthday...

Nostos

There was an apple tree in the yard —
this would have been
forty years ago — behind,
only meadows. Drifts
off crocus in the damp grass.
I stood at that window:
late April. Spring
flowers in the neighbor's yard.
How many times, really, did the tree
flower on my birthday,
the exact day, not
before, not after? Substitution
of the immutable
for the shifting, the evolving.
Substitution of the image
for relentless earth. What
do I know of this place,
the role of the tree for decades
taken by a bonsai, voices
rising from tennis courts —
Fields. Smell of the tall grass, new cut.
As one expects of a lyric poet.
We look at the world once, in childhood.
The rest is memory.



i like this poem that addresses my fading memory.....and the choices that can be made with memory.....

elaborate hoaxes/hacks/pranks

ok, so this evening was the academic team banquet...not quite the end of year...because there is still the derby festival and the nationals in chicago....the host's son visited harvard and mit over spring break....he is a math whiz......and the parents were asking us questions such as...how did you get your child into an ivy league school....?.....for starts...we did not get our child into an ivy league school....he got himself in....we only signed his application and gave financial info.....it was all his own initiative.....and we offered that advice tho these saltoftheearth folks.......he must make the moves....with guidance......buit i digress from my desired topic....we got to talking about pranks....there were some centre professors there...and they started in with pranks.....starting with the recent mit computer-generated gibberish paper that got accepted for publication at harvard....and the discussion went on to the police car on top of the mit dome......but when i checked out pranks on line...the best was by caltech......and their prank at the rose bowl between minnesota and washington....the game was played in pasadena....in caltech's backyard....and somehow the caltech fellows got the washington pep club's flash cards to say .....caltech...at some point during the game.......totally unexpected....and incredibly clever.......there is something really exhillerating about pranks.....as mentioned earlier...the usda cafeteria named after a known cannibal was beyond witty..........of course...even my alma mater The Ohio State Univerisity was listed in the top 10 pranks of all times...something about arming the homeless.....hmmmm.......after my time......

the difference between me and oprah....

ok, so i have concluded that the difference between me and her....aside from the annual income thing....aside from the fact that we both have good friends named gail....and like to read really good books....and both have devoted partners........is that oprah can say what she thinks without upsetting people.....and i cannot.....not that i try very hard at this....just this morning her name was evoked ..if vaguely...when we were discussing how we would handle a colleague's spouse, who i have heard all about but never met, after her demise......'i will surely ask him...at the funeral home...just what was wrong with your banana cake......?' i chortled......"i won't be able to help it...it will just come out of my mouth.........of course...he will probably up and hit me......'i laughed......'oprah would probably handle the situation better......'gentle readers.....we in public health are not blessed with the available viewing time slot to watch the queen of daytime....and even if the waiting room television is tuned to oprah.....it can never be so loud as for anyone int he office to actually follow the dialogue.....and so what we know of her show is what we might watch on a random day off when everything else is done......the groceries put up...the children picked up.....and then the tv comes on.....i can name on 1 hand the shows that i have watched in toto...and those were either on days that i was too sick to change the channel....or the guest was too grand to......well maybe not...i cannot think that i have ever taped her show.....maybe i shoudl do that.....but......i remain on a minimal television lifestyle.....the only show that i watch faithfully is alias...from 9-10 on wednesday evenings.....and even that was a partial viewing on wednesday due to boom club.......oprah....i am sure that we ahve more that makes us similar than we have that makes us different.....i will give it more thought and get back to you..........

let's go krogering.....

ok, so on the way home from work i stopped at the kroger's...mostly because what i needed could not be found at the far-cheaper save-a-lot across the street, but also because i had seen coleus there...and thought i would have the chance to plant them this afternoon.....yes....there was a partial flat of this bright red/green annual bedding plant.....and some white nicotinia (related to the tobacco plant, but flowering...) to complement it.....and then there was the meat selection.......lots of good meat in the markdown bin....wow...i will admit, gentle readersl to being an unbashed carnivore....despite my not knowing any of the heifers involved......and though i have many meatless meals i like the taste of really good beef gravy with mashed potatoes to ever fully give up beef.......but i digress from the episode at the check-out....i selected the line with the grey-headed lady, because i sensed her to be stereotypically sweet and grandmotherly.....ha!.....she was in a real snit because there was a stray child (about 5)......standing at the end of her line being a real dennis-the-menace...asking her about what she was doing and why....and this little lady was about to burst.....she went so far as to say go away...you bother me.....a classic w.c. fields line....i actually laughed out loud....and when she turned to me with a glare that could peel paint....i demured and made myself busy by bagging the groceries.....and then a really inept fellow rushed up and non-verbally demanded that he be the one to bag my groceries.......i knew from the start that he was an idiot....because he grabbed my baguette and attempted to stuff it into one of those flimsy plastic bags.......my little grey lady cashier had decorated her kroger apron with all sorts of tgifridays flare pins.......another amusement.....i was really enjoying the moment for what it was..........life is grand, isn't it...when you stop to smell the flowers.............

finally found....

ok, so i have been searching for these translated lyrics....finally located on aria-database.com

Vissi d'arte, Tosca's aria from Tosca

Vissi d’arte, vissi d’amore, I lived for my art, I lived for love,
non feci mai male ad anima viva! I never did harm to a living soul!
Con man furtiva With a secret hand
quante miserie conobbi aiutai. I relieved as many misfortunes as I knew of.
Sempre con fè sincera Always with true faith
la mia preghiera my prayer
ai santi tabernacoli salì. rose to the holy shrines.
Sempre con fè sincera Always with true faith
diedi fiori agl’altar. I gave flowers to the altar.
Nell’ora del dolore In the hour of grief
perchè, perchè, Signore, why, why, o Lord,
perchè me ne rimuneri così? why do you reward me thus?
Diedi gioielli della Madonna al manto, I gave jewels for the Madonna’s mantle,
e diedi il canto agli astri, al ciel, and I gave my song to the stars, to heaven,
che ne ridean più belli. which smiled with more beauty.
Nell’ora del dolor In the hour of grief
perchè, perchè, Signor, why, why, o Lord,
ah, perchè me ne rimuneri così? ah, why do you reward me thus?

Translation by Rebecca Burstein (rburstei@brynmawr.edu)

so lovely.........

newman day

ok, so i read with horror this morning on-line at princeton.edu about the upcoming newman's day...april 24...the annual 24-beers-in-24-hours tradition that takes place on campus a la Paul Newman, whose alleged "24 beers in a case, 24 hours in a day. Coincidence? I think not" quote is supposed to be the origin of the tradition's name.
The story attracted national media, and Newman subsequently took out a full-page ad in The Daily Princetonian discouraging binge drinking. a student group is handing out free orange rubber wristbands engraved with the word "Livesmart" at Frist Campus Center 'we're not saying don't drink....we are just saying to be smart about it'..... last year the same group handed out t-shirts that said "Celebrate Newman's Day 2004 . . . by honoring Scott's memory." Scott Newman, the actor's son, died of a drug overdose in 1978 at age 28. horror was my first emotion, because i recalled with a wave of nausea the experience that our family has had with alcohol poisoning....the consumption of enough alcohol to hospitalize if not kill....not a scenario to be desired by those seeking a good time....but i guess i should say that my horror was tinged with amusement....as the thought of drinking 24 beers in 24 hours for some higher purpose seems silly enough to be funny.......kind of like the amusement/horror i feel when i think of the dining room at the usda....1n 1977 US government officials staged a grand opening ceremony of their brand new Department of Agriculture staff canteen, attended by Robert Bergland, US agriculture secretary. Bergland unveiled a brass plaque naming it the "Alfred Packer Memorial Dining Facility", after one of Americas most famous nineteenth century frontiersmen. A few months later the plaque was hurriedly removed when someone remembered what the late Mr Packer had been chiefly famous for : he was a cannibal, convicted of killing and eating five Colorado gold prospectors in the 1870s. so while i am amused that the usda would name its cafeteria after a famous cannibal.....i am certainly not promoting cannabilism.....there are few people that i like well enough to befriend..let alone eat....and what fun would it be to eat strangers or folks one dislikes...but i digress from newman's day.....the day would be far less dangerous if smaller beers...say those cute 7-ounce little kings were substituted....24 x 7 oz is still a lot of beer, but far less toxic.......

earth day...

ok, so about 25 years ago i remember gathering with my entire school on the front lawn of the campus for a ceremony to witness the planting of a tree in honor of the first earth day........and the lessons that week in class revolved around reducing/reusing/recycling to save the planet....at the time i do not recall catching the fervor of anything about the reuse part.....because i was from a reuse family...heck...my chore when i visted my grandmother in cleveland was often to wash out the baggies and hang them on the line to dry with clothespins.......these days were are a total r/r/r clan........and this is a good thing......hopefully my offspring will continue this tradition when they move on.......on the other hand.....having visited 2 of my spouse's siblings in the past 3 weeks....i was startled to discover that neither recycled anything at all...not even glass or aluminum......ouch....what do they think happens to this stuff.......that it just goes away and there will always be more........after 25 years of focus on saving the world there still seems so much more to be done....even with our blood kin.........gosh.....it is so hard to be an aging hippie......what i really wish for is a new generation of tree-hugging savetheplanet types.......yeah....that's what i wish for........

lsats....

ok, so i ran into one of my favorite people tonight at the roots and shoots annual film festival.....someone who used to come into the restaurant to eat with her spouse on a weekly basis.....and she is studying to take the lsats.....she has a masters degree in nursing...and has been out of the job market for quite some time raising children.....and her father and brothers are all lawyers....and she was apparantly dissuaded from that path when she was getting ready to go to college.....'honey, you need to find a profession for a woman, not a man'....was the basic message and lack of encouragement she got as a young woman.......'and don't let on to men that you are smart, because you will scare them off'.....was the other chilling talk she could recall her father having with her before she left for school.....and thus i am so proud of her gumption to go to law school...she wants to work with malpractice cases.....wow......that would be like me deciding to go to law school......nope.......too much other things i'd rather do......

blank stare

ok, so i made a suggestion to a client today....and was met with a blank stare....the vacant look of someone who has no clue what is meant by the idea......not so much of a poo-poo of the notion, but a complete and utter failure to comprehend that things could be done differently.......my client was accompanied by 2 rambunctious boys aged about 18 months and 3 years.......these guys were rolling around on the floor of the waiting room when i called my client in....and continued said behavior into the appointment's required elements of measuring, lab tests and the like......the mother admonished these young ones to behave.....very vague as directives go.....and at some point she turned to me to apologize for their behavior....this is where my maternal been-there...done-that light went on...and i offered kindly.......'next time you might want to bring a few small activities to occupy their time while you wait and while they are in the clinic area.....like board books, a small car...beanie baby...flashcards....things like that'........and she looked at me like i had 2 heads.......she said they are just fine without her having to bring stuff along to entertain them......omg....if she considers that level of behavior as just fine and if she does not see herself in any position to prevent such behavior in future.....then i have real doubts about the world as we know it...it became clear to me that her home was not a haven of small things to occupy time......or at least anything portable......and that the possibility of controlling her children's behavior through structured activities was way over her head........think back, gentle readers....to the mother i raved about last week...the one who was going through flashcards with her extremely well-behaved sons as she waited her turn......she had it all figured out....and my client today had no interest in figuring anything out.......so sad......

my mother is a fish.....

ok, so tonight at book club we discussed dave eggers a heartbreaking work of staggering genius...in keeping with all of the other books that i have suggested...there were some who disliked the book...and others who likened it to faulkener....the discussion was good...lots of emotion either way....the most poignant moment came when a fellow proclaimed that the book was so over the top as to be likely a lie and that he lost faith in it half way through because it could not have happened this way......and my good friend from the middle of ohio (henceforth to called midohio)retorted that if she were to recall the last 3 years of her life in print...it would be raw and overthetop and totally true....so do not doubt the truth in this particular volume of memories....for my part......they could have been worse....i tend to remember everything better than it was....and i always weigh about 10 pounds less in my memories.....but then again...i am allowed to put the golden spin on the things i choose to remember....and the sooty stain on things i choose to forget.....and that is what is right and fair about memory...our own perception of what happened....because nobody ever knows what really happened...when one gathers together all of the accounts.....even the gospels have 4 separate accounts of what really happened....and none agree totally on what happened, what was said, and who was there.......and can we accurately say that the gospels are raw and over the top just because what is said is so unbelievable......with miracles and such........of course....i did not say any of these things at book club...these thoughts are merely random thoughts that came to me on the way home...or since finishing up the last 25 minutes of alias on abc.....i am never so articulate in public as i feel at the keyboard.......i am not a standup bookclub orator who can ad lib brilliant comments.......and that is ok......i had a good time....with good people....and now i can reflect the best possible take on the event for my on-line document.....for those new to this blog.....it started as a way to record my life so that i could reread it when my mind fades and my wits fail me......could happen next week, or in the next 20 years.....but i will be ready....and when i can no longer blog....well.....somebody will know that once i had something worthwhile to say......and if the best thing that can be said is a line from faulkner....my mother is a fish....well...that is true.....i am a pisces.....and proud to be a dreamer of dreams...........

George Voinovich

ok, so may i add that George Voinovich, the senator that derailed the committee vote on bolton yesterday is from......ohio.....yep, they really do grow them to be mavericks in the buckeye state.....and irreverent...though i am certain the dubya himself later called georgie at home to fuss a might......at least the nomination is stalled for the moment.....and there hearings will continue....and that means there is more time for people that this guy has stomped and harassed to come forward to tell their tales........this good news, plus the news of the ethics committee investigation of allegations aginst tom delay.....gosh, this is a mighty fine day for america......

more on the pope......

ok, so i was stunned this this morning.......when i asked my supervisor, a nurse about my age and a life-long catholic, about her feelings on the papal election....she told me she was disappointed.....that she was hoping for someone progressive...soemone who would consider the option for married priests....and/or female celebate priests......s i said.....i was shocked.....because this person does not strike me at all as liberal...she told me that priests were once allowed to be married, but that the church changed the rules when priests, supported by their parishes, started having 10-12 children......it was cheaper to have unmarried priests......but these days there are so few men who agree to the celibacy part and/or the unmarried part.....and many parishes have no fulltime priest at all......this i knew....the priest in danville has to cover another church 10 miles away between early and late mass......and jesus never said.......let those who feed my sheep be celibate and unmarried.......but you never know....this new guy might just see god in a burning bush some morning....and god may just tell him that celibate, unmarried priests only led to sexual abuse scandals...and were a bad idea.......one can only hope that this old guy can see well enough and hear well enough to get that message.......

good news....

ok, so the center fpor disease control announced today that researchers there have reanalyzed the data on obesity and risk for death....and concluded that people who are slightly overweight have less risk than folks who are of normal weight........and that there may be evidence to suggest that the range considered normal should be upgraded a bit.......i did not forward this article to my spouse, who would certainly retort that i am more than slightly overweight.....but you cannot have it all, can you................

my mom's big adventure....

ok, so we have heard from my mom.....and she is in new mexico....at an elderhostel studying the fiction of tony hillerman....and she had dinner with dear friends of ours who live in albequeruque......in particular a womam i graduated with in 1974.....who is on a cane....and intermittently gay.....which i discussed in detail with the child who asked......she and her partner in the late 70's tried to have a child in vitro...an failed...and they gave us all of their little boy clothes.....which we used twice...obviously......and then they broke up...and there was a moment of heterosexual fervor...in which my friend sent a waterford violet vase that i treasure.....and then there was nothing.....for years......except to my mother......and now my mother has had dinner with her and her siblings...and no message to me....hmm.....am i to assume that all of my relationships turn bad.......eventually.......it is all about me...isn't it?

fragile

ok, so.....on my way home i turned onto the cross-pike called faulkner station road......only to find that there were 4 vehicles lined up like a convoy....repainting the stripes.....who knew...gentle readers....that this road required new stripes.....i travel this road 3 out of 5 work days.....and never has the impulse leaped from some kinetic connection......this road needs restriping........and so i crept along behind....ever so slowly....until i was waved around to pass......and at some point i was in tears........non sequitor......no reason to be in tears....the radio commentary was about the pope....and though i profess interest i am not catholic.....but yet i felt close to tears..was this man complicit in the killing of jews...he is the right age.....was he a nazi at some point.....i was personally stunned to see pictures of my own nazi heritage in my family's european home when we visited in 2002......is menopause such a transient state that the restriping of roads and the election of a possibly nazi germanic pope can wreck havoc upon the hormonally sensitive..........heaven help us for the next...what 5-6 years if this is a hormonally induced state.........

parties....

ok, so we are in the season to party...what with major milestone birthdays and graduations at hand.....and those who are to be honored seem to think that i am totaly insane for suggesting a casual gathering to celebrate milestone birthdays/graduations./......did i make this up, gentle readers?......do not reasonable people celebrate graduations?....and the turning of 50 and/or 21?........could it really be that i just want to show off my garden....as has been suggested of late......of course...the timing of such events could be tricky....with church events...school events...etc.......somehow this will all work out........

bullies.....

ok, so i am heartened that reasonable republicans have risen up to block/delay confirmation of bolton as ambassador to the u.n. and are urging the resignation of tom delay...the new yorker article due out tomorrow said it best....that delay's gerrymandering of texas voting districts just got his party rolling toward more misdeeds....and that the bursting of his bubble was basically his to own deflate, not the democrats to dart through their evil doings..............all this...and a new pope too.....so much to consider on a global level for one miniscule commentator...for starts......the new pope is german...and i have to give him the benefit of the doubt for that distinction alone......i really wish i could speak german......i find this lacking a real loss to our culture.....the second and third generation americans who cannot speak their mother tongue because speaking it undermined assimilation......the hispanics will discover this loss soon....their children will not be able to understand grandma when she travels up from mexico.....tragic, really...that those who value a free society cannot accomodate bi-lingual or tri-lingual residents...but i digress from the bullies delay and bolton......how can the bush adminstration back men who are so clearly hostile to their cause.....so lacking in anything vaguely of value when it comes to personal constraint.......the best thing to do for bullies is to ignore them....and eventually their kind will go away......

i'll fly away...

ok, so if i a mgoing to awake between 3 and 4:00 trying to remember the words to i'll f'ly away...i might as well have the exact lyrics available

I'll Fly Away
Alison Krauss And Gillian Welch
(O Brother, Where Art Thou? Soundtrack)

Some bright morning when this life is o'er,
I'll fly away;
To that home on God's celestial shore,
I'll fly away (I'll fly away).

Chorus
I'll fly away, Oh Glory
I'll fly away; (in the morning)
When I die, Hallelujah, by and by,
I'll fly away (I'll fly away).

When the shadows of this life have gone,
I'll fly away;
Like a bird from these prison walls I?l fly,
I'll fly away (I'll fly away).

Chorus
I'll fly away, Oh Glory
I'll fly away; (in the morning)
When I die, Hallelujah, by and by,
I'll fly away (I'll fly away).

Oh how glad and happy when we meet
I?l fly away
No more cold iron shackles on my feet
I?l fly away.

I'll fly away, Oh Glory
I'll fly away; (in the morning)
When I die, Hallelujah, by and by,
I'll fly away (I'll fly away).

Chorus
I'll fly away, Oh Glory
I'll fly away; (in the morning)
When I die, Hallelujah, by and by,
I'll fly away.

Just a few more weary days and then,
I'll fly away;
To a land where joys will never end,
I'll fly away.

Chorus
I'll fly away, Oh Glory
I'll fly away; (in the morning)
When I die, Hallelujah, by and by,
I'll fly away (I'll fly away).


this business of waking up and not getting back to sleep is getting old, by the way......

shouts and murmurs.....

ok, so i enjoy reading the new new yorker online before it ever travels across town from the printer to my door.......this week the article listed was tragically funny....

speling errorrs......

ok, so the meanmamaw mackes a feuw errorrs hershelf onn occasssiooon.......pelise dew knot holed thise agenst mee......

popevote2005

ok, so despite being decidedly non-catholic.....i am wrapped up in the conclave.....yeah...i DID listen to all 22 hours of angels and demons on cd....driving back from vermont last spring break....and i find the tradition and the intrigue fascinating......despite the numerous on-line articles...some things remain vague.....do these 115 cardinals have to stick it out in the sistine chapel until the vote is conclusive......or can they leave to go to the potty or to sleep til tomorrow.......what's the deal?.........these guys are all 60+ and certainly to be on multiple medications......they could not possibly handle an extended all-nighter.......but no body seems to be able to explain that aspect of the election.....is it debate until they drop...or is this a session by session gentlemanly debate....with time out for bathroom breaks, bottled water.....and some cnn..........

snakes......

ok, so i will say this once....and every time i blog about my garden in the future be aware that this statement remains true though not repeated......i really dislike snakes.......dislike may be the wrong sentiment.......i do not hate snake......the fact that we have them speaks volumes as to the underlying health of our little microcosm.........i am not essentially afraid of snakes.......by saying that i mean that i have no fear that they will 1)attack ruthlessly 2)inject lethal venom if they get close enough 3)come toward me when seen, rather than slither away.........BUT.......the fear of snakes is what drives my gardening tactics....i start with the beds least likely to harbor snakes....and finish with the beds most likely to have at least 1 snake sunning in some small clearing between plants and weeds.........yesterday i reached such a bed......and basically was on red level alert.......making as much noise and possible to give the snake(s) the heads up as to my intentions.....and give them plenty of time to clear out.......the sun is still shining...i could go out and weed at bit...in the snake-ridden zone.......or maybe not.........

i'll fly away.....

ok, so i woke up in thje night really overheated....and then had a song pop into my brain......one that would not turn down either the volume nor the loops of replay.....an old country-style gospel song....i'll fly away....we had heard it on prairie home companion as we were driving to cincinnati......and i only know the chorus....which made for a rather boring interlude before falling back asleep......curiously, i dreamed that we had real half and half for my coffee in the refrigerator.....which was not reality......drat.....htere is nothing better for one's morning pickmeup......and after being awake for a time between 3:00 am and 3:30 am...i need that little milk-smoothed caffeine jolt....

middle of ohio.....

ok, so the niece that is getting married in june....will be living in the middle of ohio......and there were those at the shower event who made light of that location....but i raised my solo voice of reason...there is nothing whatsoever to be said against being raised in the heart of ohio.....in rutherford b. hayes country....not so much taft.. or grant....they were from the southern part of ohio....and not garfield or mckinnley...they were from the cleveland area......mostly i am thinking of harding......who was from a small town called marion ohio...just 18 miles from y home town of mt gilead............ yeh, well, harding has his own problems, with the teapot dome scandal....but people have since moved on to bill clinton's many woes....and have forgotten altogether that this guy from the middle of ohio was an adulterer.....and a scoundrel of the 1st level.........and had he not died in office he would have been impeached.......but that he was a republican....and those elephant-loving folks have such a short memories when it comes to adultury and scoundrel-ism...........

the 12 x 12 rose......

ok, so this evening we spent a great deal of time repairing our gates....the gate into the driveway.....the gate to the lake......the fence and gates are at least 18 years old....nd have settled with time...and rusted a bit.....and so it took a bit of wd40 and an electric buzzsaw to even out the gate versus driveway...and the gate versus patio.........and the BIG rose....well it just sat there...being very big.......the variety is snow bush....and my brotherinlawwhogrowsroses said it would be a monster......and so this single rose bush takes up an entire section of our lot.....and when it is in bloom we cannot see our across the street neighbors at all......which is why it is where it is......but this rose blooms only once......and so for the rest of the year we see brilliant foliage and no white rosettes.......ah well.....

baltimore orioles....

ok, so the mm is elated that the baltimore orioles have swept the nyy...and that the owner is mighty upset......money cannot buy everything......

weeds versus perennials

ok, so i am still on the gardening thread of consciousness.......back to the notion that what i consider a weed could be what somebody else considers to be a desirable plant.......the fine line is so personal........violets saved versus lambs ear tossed......or errant lilyofthevalley pulled out of the walk while their comrades just inside the bed protected carefully until the upcoming spring show.......so much of gardening is in the knowing what to pull and what not to pull.......which is why i have the consumate trust in the judgement of my middle child on such things.....and no faith whatsoever in my youngest...who sees weeding as a clear-it-out proposition....rather than a selective situation....and she lacks the patience to learn what is week and what is not.....at least in our local definition......this has nothign to do with preconceived notions......she moves on when invited to learn about weeding...and such disinterest is not conducive to success in the final spring flash of brilliant colors.......i just love my yard.....have i mentioned this before?

the mm of the mm.....

ok, so it is sunday evening....and we are not really sure just where my mother is.......yes....my spouse drove her to the aiport on friday...and she was heading for 1st alberquerque...and then farmington for an elderhostel on tony hillerman mystery novels....and then to visit her cousin who was a surgeon on the navaho reservation, and then to colorado to visit dear college friends...and then to texas to visit her childhood friend married to a 9-time tour of duty vietnam vet........well...we know all of these things......except that she claims to have left us a list of flights, phone numbers....and the all-important return pick-up information....and we cannopt locate these things just yet.........hmmm.....and she has not called to let us know that she made it any of the above places........all we have is her porcine shetland sheep dog.....and her mail........i suppose when i am her age i will wreck havoc upon my children in the same fashion............hopefully worse.....if there is a god........

weekend update......

ok, so this weekend had been a blur.......what with my weekends beginning at about 1:30 pm on fridays.......so much to do, so little time........i stopped and bought 3 flats of annuals on my way home from harrodsburg on friday.......burgundy pansies, yellow marigolds, and a low white plant that had no name but wasn't dusty miller.......and i planted these in all of my outdoor boxes, bins and urns........in addition to moving lambs ear and other assorted perennials......scw went out to celebrate a significant birthday in lexington......acw and his lovely girlfriend showed up for supper.......on to saturday morning.......where upon i still managed to do some weeding in between fits of inertia......until we all jumped in the car to drive to concinnati for the remnants of a bridal shower for the niece born just as i was starting to date my spouse in 1980.....we brought her an assortment of infant socks when she was born ....as directed by my late motherinlaw..this time a check was all that was required........lots of family were on hand......great food.....good to see everybody...late to bed.....my brotherinlaw greg has an outdoor firepit for entertaining...but it was too cold and the smell of burning wood too offending....and thus we stayed inside and watched indepedence day instead.......ah well.......this morning i was the first out of bed...and downstairs to have a breakfast of leftovers......excellent chicken salad and macaroni salad with premium squeeze orange juice....life doesn't get much better........i started feeling congested....and no wonder.....our car was covered in goldish green pollen when we left for home........for more work.......i painted 8 french-garden style folding chairs.......and weeded part of the brick walk....weeding a walk is a task that requires the utmost in patience......one wants the baby-toes succulent to thrive, whilst wishing that the weeds and errant lamb's ear, violets, wild strawberries, lilies, and other assorted weeds would fail and die.......the old saying is so true....one man's weed is another mans perennial........i was pulling out lambs ear hand over fist.....but couldn't begin to part with blooming violets that had taken root between my paving stones.......i also refuse to pull any plant i do not recognize......or anything i want to take hold....like moss, this babytoe kind of succulent.......amongst others........i finished the paint job with green spatters everywhere........and since oil-based paint doesn not come off easily....i can still see traces in my fingernails, as well as a few spots on my legs and feet.........the chairs are precious to me.......not only because they look so parisian...but also because they fold up and stow away for the winter so nicely.......maybe they are dry enough to move to the deck......as mentioned on numerous occassions....my idea of a good day involves coffee in one of those chairs, on the deck, while the mist is rising off of the creek......with the newspaper in hand......and planty of time to tarry before work..........tomorrow morning?........

lefties

ok, so today i had a revelation as i was digging...that i dig better with my right foot than my left......hmmmmm......strange for a leftie...but then i am always amazed at how my body's right and left sides make no sense.....lots of good company...here is an exhaustive list borrowed from the web

Left-Handed U.S. Presidents
James A. Garfield (1831-1881) 20th
Herbert Hoover (1874-1964) 31st
Harry S. Truman (1884-1972) 33rd
Gerald Ford (1913- ) 38th
Ronald Reagan (1911 - ) 40th
George H.W. Bush (1924- ) 41st
Bill Clinton (1946- ) 42nd

Left-Handed U.S. Politicos
Senator Bill Bradley, Rhodes scholar, basketball star
Benjamin Franklin, statesman/publisher/scientist
Steve Forbes, businessman/publisher
Ruth Bader Ginsberg, Supreme Court Justice
Senator Daniel Inouye
Anthony Kennedy Supreme Court Justice
Robert S. McNamara, Secretary of Defense
Col. Oliver North, White House aid
H. Ross Perot, businessman
William Perry, Secretary of Defense
Nelson Rockefeller, Vice President
Senator Bob Dole - switched to left due to injury]

Miscellaneous Left-Handers
Joan of Arc (?), French heroine
Ramses II (?), Egyptian pharaoh
Tiberius (?), Roman emperor
Alexander the Great
Charlemagne, Holy Roman emperor
Julius Caesar, Roman general
Napoléon Bonaparte (?), French emperor
Josephine de Beauharnais
King Louis XVI of France
Queen Victoria of England
King George II of England
King George VI of England
Prince Charles of England
Prince William of England
Fidel Castro, Cuban leader
Benjamin Netanyahu, Israeli prime-minister
Henry Ford, automobile manufacturer
David Rockefeller, banker
Dwight F. Davis, founder of the Davis Cup in tennis
Helen Keller, advocate for the blind
Dr. Albert Schweitzer, physician/missionary
August Piccard, inventor of stratosphere, bathosphere
Edwin Buzz Aldrin, astronaut
Wally Schirra, astronaut
Paul Prudhomme, chef
Lord Baden-Powell, founder of the Boy Scouts (ambidexterous)
Dave Barry, journalist
Edward R. Murrow, correspondent
Ted Koppel, journalist
Forrest Sawyer, journalist
John F. Kennedy, Jr., lawyer/publisher
Caroline Kennedy, lawyer/author
Ron Reagan, son of Ronald Reagan
Vin Scully, sports broadcaster
David Letterman (?), host
Jay Leno, host
Lenny Bruce, comedian
Uri Geller, psychokinetic performer
Richard Simmons, exercise guru
Euell Gibbons, naturalist
General H. Norman Schwarzkopf
Clarence Darrow, lawyer
F. Lee Bailey, lawyer
Cathy Guisevite, cartoonist
Matt Groening, cartoonist
Pat Robertson, evangelist/politician
Boston Strangler (Albert Henry DeSalvo), serial killer
Jack-the-Ripper, serial killer
Bart Simpson, cartoon character

Left-Handed Authors
James Baldwin, novelist
Peter Benchley, novelist
Lewis Carroll
Helen Hooven Santmyer, novelist
Mark Twain, novelist
H.G. Wells
Jessamyn West
Eudora Welty

Left-Handed Musicians

David Byrne (Talking Heads)
Glen Campbell
Natale Cole
Kurt Cobain (Nirvana)
Phil Collins (Genesis)
Billy Corgan (Smashing Pumpkins)
Don Everly (The Everly Brothers)
Phil Everly (The Everly Brothers)
Bela Fleck, jazz musician
Glenn Frey (the Eagles)
Noel Gallagher (Oasis) (?)
Errol Garner, jazz pianist
Judy Garland
Crysal Gayle
Jimi Hendrix
Isaac Hayes
Melissa Manchester
Paul McCartney (the Beatles; Wings)
George Michael (Wham!)
Robert Plant (Led Zepplin)
Cole Porter, song-writer
Lou Rawls
John Lydon a.k.a. Johnny Rotten (Sex Pistols / Public Image Ltd.)
Seal
Ringo Starr (?) (the Beatles)
Paul Simon (Simon & Garfunkel)
Tiny Tim
Rudy Valee

Left-Handed Artists

Albrecht Dürer
M.C. Escher
Hans Holbein
Paul Klee
Michelangelo
LeRoy Neiman
Raphael
Leonardo da Vinci (RH paralyzed?)

Left-Handed Actors
Don Adams
Dan Aykroyd
Eddie Albert
Tim Allen
Robert Blake
Matthew Broderick
Bruce Boxleitner
Carol Burnett
George Burns, comedian
Ruth Buzzi, comedienne
Sid Caesar, comedian
Keith Carradine
Charlie Chaplin
George Gobel, comedian
Chuck Conners
Tom Cruise
Matt Dillon
Marty Engles, comedian
Olivia de Havilland
Robert DeNiro
Fran Drescher, comedian
Richard Dreyfuss
W.C. Fields
Peter Fonda
Greta Garbo
Terri Garr
Paul Michael Glaser
Whoopie Goldberg
Betty Grable
Cary Grant
Peter Graves
Mark Hamill
Rex Harrison
Goldie Hawn
Tippi Hedren
Jim Henson, puppetteer
Kermit the Frog
Rock Hudson
Angelina Jolie
Gabe Kaplan
Danny Kaye
Diane Keaton
George Kennedy
Nicole Kidman
Lisa Kudrow
Michael Landon
Hope Lange
Joey Lawrence
Peter Lawford
Cloris Leachman
Hal Linden
Cleavon Little
Shirley MacLaine
Andrew McCarthy
Kristy McNichol
Steve McQueen
Howie Mandel, comedian
Marcel Marceau, mime
Harpo Marx
Marsha Mason
Mary Stuart Masterson
Anne Meara, comedian
Marilyn Monroe
Robert Morse
Kim Novak
Ryan O'Neal
Sarah Jessica Parker
Estelle Parsons
Anthony Perkins
Ron Perlman
Luke Perry
Bronson Pinchot
Joe Piscopo, comedian
Richard Pryor, comedian
Robert Redford
Keanu Reeves
Don Rickles, comedian
Julia Roberts
Mickey Rourke
Eva Marie Saint
Telly Savalas
Jerry Seinfeld, comedian
Christian Slater
Dick Smothers, comedian
Rod Steiger
Alan Thicke
Emma Thompson
Peter Ustinov
Rudy Vallee
Dick Van Dyke
Treat Williams
Bruce Willis
Oprah Winfrey
Mare Winningham
Joanne Woodward
Keenan Wynn
Stephanie Zimbalist

Left-Handed Athletes
SOCCER
Pelé -Edson Arantes do Nascimento (soccer)
Diego Armando Maradona (soccer)
Romario (soccer)
Hugo Sanchez (soccer)
Richard Witschge (soccer)

OLYMPIC SPORTS
Francis X. Gorman (diving)
Greg Louganis (diving)
Mark Spitz (swimming)
Bruce Jenner (decathlon)

Dorothy Hamill (skating)

TENNIS
Kenneth Carlsen (tennis)
Jimmy Connors (tennis)
Rod Laver (tennis)
Henri LeConte (tennis)
John McEnroe (tennis)Thomas Muster (tennis)
Martina Navratilova (tennis) - ambidexterous
Monica Seles (tennis)
Roscoe Tanner (tennis)
Guillermo Vilas (tennis)

BASEBALL
Whitey Ford (pitcher)
Ron Guidry (pitcher)
Randy Johnson (pitcher)
Barry Bonds (baseball)
Wade Boggs (baseball)
Ty Cobb (baseball)
Adrian Dantley (basketball)
Tom Glavine (baseball)
Ken Griffey, Jr. (baseball)
Rickey Henderson (baseball)
Kent Hrbek (baseball)
"Shoeless" Joe Jackson (baseball)
Reggie Jackson (baseball)
Sandy Koufax (baseball)
Stan Musial (baseball)
Babe Ruth (baseball)
"Neon" Deion Sanders (baseball/Am.football)
Casey Stengel (baseball)
Darryl Strawberry (baseball)
Ted Williams (baseball)
Fernando Valenzuela (baseball)
Tommy Lasorda (baseball manager)

lounging.....

ok, so spring saturday mornings may be my favorite time slots........sleep til 7:30 or so......lots of coffee...newspaper on the deck.......stroll through the garden with the steam rising off of said coffee.....on these occassions i comtemplate the locations of plants......watch for emergence of perennials.....monitor the development of flower buds on rose bushes.....just this morning i noticed that a clematis i thought to be dead has risen from the grave......of course....i really should change out of my jammies and get to work...but lounging about with my coffee and thinking about work suits me just fine....or at least until the sun gets a little warmer and the dew is dried off the grass.......

hard labor

ok, so i worked in the garden for 4 solid hours yesterday.......and one has to look closely to see exactly what was done.........that is the nature if yard work......lots of effort for no discernable benefits......well...the total effect is the benefit....but with plants that have yet bloomed....there is none at the moment......i did move a 5 x 5 foot patch of lamb's ear from the area i use for vegetables or for seed cutting flowers....i used some to edge the bed that i cleaned out last weekend....and some to edge the bed that surrounds one of the redbud trees....had i purchased many plants...at say...$4.99 a 4-inch pot.....that would be about $75 worth of free plants...speaking of value...i did move 2 others patches of plants from the 'seed' bed......both grown from seeds that i purchased at monticello 2 years ago...one was an inhteresting daisy..the other was a double columbine......none of the other seeds came to much......but i have enough plants of these 2 varieties to say i have my money's worth.....i made the mistake of mentioning at supper last night just how much i had spent on seeds on the occassion in question...ooops...i won't make the same mistake in this venue.....and so the cleaned-out bed is filling back up with a new and improved mix of perennials......along with the lamb's ear, columbine, and daisies i moved several clumps of another grayish fuzzy-leafed plants that blooms fuschia...the name escapes me.....as do the names of all the new roses i planted 2 summers ago...all grown from cuttings by my brotherinlawwhohastherosarium.....i must come up with a shorter way to say that.....the pen he used to write the names on the little plastic tags was not permanent...and the tags are all blank....speaking of roses....i must buy rose food today....i am overdue at feeding said plants......of course.....i could and should get right on out in the yard and resume my labor on this glorious saturday....but my bones are in too much agony from yesterday's work session........we joked at supper last night that there is so much lamb's ear that maybe i could set up a roadside stand to sell it.....maybe with a sign that says...child accepted at princeton...must sacrifice precious plants to pay tuition.......for the record.....i any of my favorite local blog readers want any lamb's ear...i would gladly part with say.....another 5 x 5 patch of it.......

adhd.......

ok, so i tried to explain to my middle child this evening that i really DO have a pervasive attention deficit...and that my generalized inattentiveness is genetic/chemical/organic.....and certainly not intentional neglect......that argument didn't go over well......though i am believing this diagnosis more as the hours wear on........anything is better than being responsible for one's children being the way they are because of one's deliberate abandonment.....this is laughable....as if either of my brilliant offspring could prove utter abandonment....this is more a subtle lack of rapt attentiveness.....quite a different thing altogether......the issue waa raised when i could not quote the name of our eldest's winning short story correctly.......the words melded together into a new title altogether.....i kind of like the improved title, by the way......and my rapt...and always correct child was right on top of this error.......as if this error meant something other than my basic inattentiveness....

wild onions.....

ok, so on the way to work this morning i listened to an npr piece about how the who tried but failed to eradicate polio in the 70's, the 80's and the 90's.....and how the disease is still with us some 50 years after the salk vaccine.......i can appreciate the problem with eradicating anything as vigorous as a virus.....i have waged a failing war against wild onions for 23 years......and the battle has only just begun.......this afternoon i devoted a full 20 minutes to pulling wild onions.......i have a book entitled the 20 minute gardener...which promises that i can acheive a stellar effect with only 20 minutes a day.......gentle readers.....while i know that those with more than 20 minutes to spare have much nicer plantings and far fewer weeds, i am like the overweight couch potato who really wants to believe that the no-exercise diet pills work miracles.......and thus...20 minutes of pulling wild onions....didn't i pull this same clump last year...and the year before?.....didn't i get all of the roots...and the dirt around the roots.....have they spontaneously regenerated from some sort of mud-mediated memory....like the feeling that an amputee can have in a missing limb.......so very annoying that 2 decades of pulling the same weeds has yielded...well....no return whatsoever.......had i known.....as a near-newlywed that nothing i pulled from this very earth would be a permanent solution.....gosh...i could have spent the time learning to speak farsi.....well...maybe not....it is only my blood kin trying to convince my offspring that farsi is worth learning.........but back to onions.......so why do i not eat them......hmmmm....because they are not as tasty as hothouse green onions.....more potent and less etherial.......you know what i mean........probably not.....the esoteric characteristics of onions is a subset of humankind......and i have met few folks who share this devotion to the allia family of fine vegetation.............makes me hungry for onions just thinking about onions...no...that is the smell underwashed onion-hands......sublime....eh?

ok, so this guy really does look like a writer, at least to the mm......he has won 2 writing awards this spring...the first was an honorable mention for a story called god is at the at the window....the second was a first place for his story called the lake.......i am so proud........ 

flashcards

ok, so today i met with a woman and her three children under age 3...and this mother was working with flashcards as she waited her turn in the lobby...stuff like colors and shapes....and even some spanish words......while all the other moms let their children roll around on the floor or rip up magazines.....i was impressed...and told her so....seems she doesn't get much support from her husband's kin...who seem to think that she should let her kids be kids......yeah, right........what possible benefit can a child gain from roilling around on the waiting room floor and ripping up periodicals.......i have fond memories of our flashcards......which sequed into the memory game.......my eldest was especially good at remembering both the word for each picture as well as its location for the match......gosh, those days seem so long ago.....but back to my client.....i did my best to be encouraging to her to keep this up......one never knows just how much extra knowledge children can soak in during random moments like waiting room downtime.......

shoes.......

ok, so driving back from lexington on route 33/68...through the palisades of the kentucky river......i came ot the conclusion that i really need at least one new pair of shoes...and said shoes should be either acid green...the color of most of the leafing trees.....or fuschia....the color of the numerous redbuds just filling out.......greeen or pink.....what a question for someone who is trapped in a black and tan mindset......i even give away brightly colored gifts, whilst sticking to monochrome accesories for myself......how trite....eh?....the pitiable mother who asks for nothing flashy for herself......if y'all believe this then i have some swampland to sell...........or maybe london bridge.....

drop everything...

ok, so at 12:15 pm my first born called on my cell phone......'my professor just told the class to be sure to come to the english department awards thing at 2:00......i guess i should show up to get my award...can you still come?....'.......we had received the letter of invitation earlier in the week......but our eldest demured about the event.......he had no time to spare for just an honorable mention in a fiction contest....but when he changed his mind and wanted somebody from home to be with him.....well our people are ready and able to drop everything when necessary....and go where-ever.......and so it came to be that at 2:00 pm i was sitting, changed, fed, and relaxed in the 2nd floor auditorium at u of k's main building.....with my boy and his roommate.....awaiting the keynote speaker...the poet marilyn hacker.......and the fiction and poetry awards....etc......'mom....that lady next to dr. edwards.....that is bobbie ann mason....'......wow......2 weeks in a row i have been in the presence of notable authors and poets......even the professor who presented andrew with his award is published.......i was glad i came up....but then...as i said....i am from drop- everything stock......when it became clear that my third pregnancy was not only a no-go...but that surgury was necessary with ectopic events......my parents were bustling in my front door with the peas they had been snapping on their back porch within 5 hours........just enough time to throw some clothes into the car and leave for kentucky.....no deliberation....no bargaining.....just drop everything and come when needed......the summer that our middle child collasped on the bicycle ride across iowa......we got out of our bed at 11:00 pm when the call came from the hospital....and we drove all night to be with him......because we are drop-everything folks.......not that dropping the filling out of health department paperwork for a quick trip to lexington is a big deal.....but it seemed to be to my son....and that is what matters most.........for the record.....none of these writers that i have met of late actually looked like writers......not that i know what a writer should look like.....but.......

to sleep, perchance to dream.....

ok, so i managed to get to bed early enough for a long night of uninterrupted sleep........and while the bones remain stiff....and my head is pounding....heck....i have gotten used to the infirmities of middle age.......but what i am not used to is the dreaming part.......why did i dream vividly one night about future grandchildren....only to have no dreams at all the next night.......was it the nyquil that prevented the sequel to the baby dream.....i was kind of looking forward to seeing where that one was going.....not that the mind follows through with things in a sequential way......simply wanting to know makes that dream scenario flat and out-of-play....ah well........might make a great short story....that baby dream.......a make-up-your-own bizarre ending kind of piece.........

daffy dreams

ok, so i had a dream, and it shook me to the core.......i want to tell you more....but not this time, gentle readers.....this dream was much too real and the particulars so disturbing as to demand only the private record.....just for my own personal reference......i find that dreaming about people i know, but not well enough to merit a starring role in a dream, is disconcerting......not to be alarming...this was simply a dream in which i held a baby in a rocking chair.....and the parental options for said baby and the other folks present were distressing at best......why this person....why this dream....why this scenario in the dream.......as i blogged earlier and un-publically......this dream could not be something that my inner soul seeks because it would just be too far-fetched and amusingly absurd in every way......unless this is my subconscious mind preparing me for the worst-case....hmm.....oh my......omg.......

baseball.......

ok, so the red sox opening day was yesterday....whereupon they received their championship rings......that was nice.....even the batboys, lockroom staff, and the 85 year old ex-player who still suits up and helps with strategy from the dugout got a ring.......nice touch.....the boston pops played backround music.....i only know this because redsox.com was nice enough to allow the streamed 27 minute version onto my computer for free.....now that is really a nice touch........too bad i cannot be happier about it this morning.....our old dog woke us up around 3:00...howling like a little lost child.......and once sleep is disrupted...well......suffice it to say that i feel beat-up this morning........like i hope the nyy felt yesterday......nice touch, eh?