green onions

ok, so yesterday i made my usual three-store loop.....big lots/kroger/aldi....in record time as i had a very short list of needs/wants...it is now my custom to bring in my own reusable shopping bags....the bringing in of bags is still a novelty for many check-out clerks, despite the fact that each of the stores on my circuit sell reusable bags at the check-out...go figure.....at the kroger i opted for the self-check out option, as the other lanes were overflowing and i had only a handful of items....but when i carefully positioned my kroger shopping bag in front of the plastic kroger bags beside the scanner unit....the electronic message kept repeating- scan the first item before putting it in the bag....yikes- i paid for this bag months ago, and it is suitably worn enough to pass muster from a scrutinizing store manager if necessary.....so the self-check clerk came over to see what was happening, and she reset the machine.....and then we came to the green onions....which i had to look up as the tinyband that holds the bunch together lacks a upc code.....i put them in the bag, only to be told to take them out and scan them before putting them in my bag.....the self-check clerk again reset the machine...but only after she took them out of my bag and took them to her master register to make sure that i had actually entered in the cost of the green onions......an exhausting kroger experience.....fast-forward, if you will, to suppertime, when i opened the refigerator to find the green onions that had caused so much difficulty....not in the drawer, not hiding behind the boxed-up leftovers, not in the trunk of the car...not in the pantry with the crackers or the mac and cheese boxes....nowhere......could the clerk have gotten so distracted with all of the malfunctioning self-checkout machines that she is still clutching my $.68 bunch of green onions?.....maddening, as this was the single item that drew me inside the krogers in the first place.....if the aldi were to carry green onions i might be able to pare my saturday loop down to 2 stores.....i suspect that i will find the green onions in their clear plastic bag in some random location in this house- and it is my wish that i find them before they start to wilt and/or ooze.....and that i am able to conceal my brief senior moment from the rest of home-for-christmas crowd....