cultural differences

ok, so it has been months since my last blog....but as this space is resrved for the preservation of my (more important) thoughts and circumstances as i age, i feel the need to put down the events of the past few days. For starters, my eldest's girlfriend has flown back to Florida to spend the holidays with her family. He plans to drive there sometime next week to meet her family and to vacation in a warm climate. The drive will take him within the geographical vicinity of the birth mother to the youngest of our children. Naturally, the opportunity to accompany the eldest was put to the youngest, and that is where the chaos began. The birth mother has hounded the youngest for 'details' of the visit. Seems there are numerous complications to a potential visit: the birth mother's spouse works three jobs, they have taken in a border with a baby who must keep her job as a condition of probation, the restraining orders against close neighbors.....you get the picture. The travel dates have been shared, but even the dates has not been enough to quell the constant stream of texts asking for more information. Should Junior take off on the expected date of arrival? Should they find a sitter for the baby? It occured to me last night, when I lay sleepless after another unfortunate interchange with the child in question about the known trip details as i knew them: there is a cultural disconnect at play here. in our family context, we get up 'early' on a travel day and drive....with stops for food and comfort when needed, armed with printed travel directions that include expected mileage and timing. when this couple have (has?) visited us, they left whenever the spouse got off work, even if it was late at night, and drove through the night....even if it meant arriving while we were still asleep.......they have been known to sleep in their car in front of our house and wait until they saw lights come on. when they were told the arrival date, they appear to have figured that this child could arrive any time after midnight on that date, rather than 14 hours after a reasonable morning starting time.....the child in question, despite her increasing agitation over the 'lack of details' has yet to google the particulars on her own...she has both addresses, and could find out for herself just how long of a trip she has in front of her.....and could possibly come to the realization that there are many factors that will confound an estimated time of arrival- sheer distance, wrecks,construction, disorientation......as for me, i will continue to pray that the eldest and the youngest can complete a journey of that length without un-mediated theatrics.....and that the visit itself will be void of drama and danger....amen, amen and amen