nearly to tears......

ok, so i do not cry often......but at some point in my afternoon it was all i could do not to break down......i was helping my mother clean her house prior to a church ladies meeting on wednesday.....and my emotions vascilated between utter horror that she would invite anyone to her home given her current state of disarray/abject laziness......and the reality that she may be on the verge of senility/manic depression.....when i arrived she had ripped every book from the wall o'shelves in her bedroom..and while she had intended to sort through the piles....she moved onto some other worthy cause...like baby blankets for haiti.....and she forgot about the books....which had become yet another layer in time when i arrived on the scene.......i discovered them only after i started to pick up the dirty laundry......ouch!.......and my mother had the nerve to direct me to 'sort' through those books before putting them back up......the bottom line is that i spent 6 solid hours filling up trash bags with either recyclables or bonafide garbage....and i have pledged an additonal 6 hours tommorrow.....so that when her cleaning lady comes on monday they can make real progress (my mother's words.......)...i suppose the most tragic theme in this rant is that at 50 years of age my mother still retains the power to cut me to the quick........