reprint.....

ok, so this article was printed thursday in the daily princetonian....i have tried unsuccessfully to forward it to friends.....here it is....just in time for valentine's day...

Thursday, February 10, 2005
The gift that keeps on giving

Ben Eachus
Guest Columnist

Sure, diamonds might get you laid. But what happens when she finds out that her new best friends are really cubic zirconia? Don't risk the embarrassment this year. The quickest way to a woman's heart is a gift she will never forget, a gift she can't return: nothing.

Men plan to spend an average of $125.96 on Valentine's Day — the cost of about seven cases of Pabst Blue Ribbon. In my 21 years, I have seen good friends splurge on pastel Longchamp bags, boxes of Godiva and romantic dinners at the Olive Garden. All of these relationships have since failed, due in no small part to the unimaginative gifts exchanged on Valentine's Day. After all, anyone can buy items listed in a gift-giving guide.

But you are more creative than that. The best gifts are the ones that are the most unexpected. In a relationship, the gift of nothing is the most surprising of all.

Just ask my mother. In 2000, when asked what she wanted for Christmas, my mother said, "I have everything I need. I really don't want anything." My father, always aiming to please, got her just that. And indeed, when she first realized that she was actually getting nothing — my popsicle stick picture frame notwithstanding — my mother was quite surprised. "You got me nothing! I can't believe you got me nothing. Absolutely nothing?"

Visibly panicked, but never losing his cool, my father reached into his pocket and took out a wad of cash. "But we agreed not to exchange gifts, didn't we? How much do you need to get yourself something?"

Today we all laugh about it. Okay, I laugh about it. And although my father purchased my mother approximately eight pounds of gold jewelry and a traffic-stopping Nativity Scene the next year, the Christmas of nothing will always be the most memorable. Isn't making memories what holidays are all about?

I know purchasing nothing seems like a risky move, a surefire way to destroy a relationship. Admittedly, when she first finds out that you got her nothing, a few phone calls might go unreturned and you might even be burned in effigy. Compared to the alternatives, though, nothing is the safest choice.

Just imagine what can go wrong when purchasing even the simplest, most traditional Valentine's gift: a box of chocolates. If you get the heart-shaped box, it will look like you are coming on too strong; opt for a rectangular box and you might as well buy a carton of Ben and Jerry's and watch Pretty Woman in your pajamas because the romance is dead. But the problems don't end there. What if you decide on chocolates that are compatible with the South Beach and the Zone but not with the Atkins? Last year I was accused of thinking a friend was fat because I bought her low-fat chocolates. Our relationship has never been the same after I told her that she was correct.

Always remember that strong relationships are built on trust. Don't lie and tell her you didn't think Valentine's Day was in February this year. Tell the truth: "I love you. I had enough time and money to buy you a present, but this year I wanted to give you the most special Valentine's Day ever. So I got you nothing." Trust me, she will thank you..

After all, it's the thought that counts.